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thebitterpoet
1 5,480 M Moving Along
PathStep 345 Compassion hearts376 Forum posts5 Forum upvotes0 Current upvotes0 Age GroupAdult Last activeFebruary, 2016 Member sinceSeptember 1, 2015
Bio

I can be a very solemn and intense person in the moments where no one is around as a distraction. That's why I'm here. Any solace or laughter I can bring to those around me is my redemption from my self perceived flaws. I hope I can find some like minded people who will help guide me to where I need to be emotionally and I hope that in being here I can do the same for others.

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I could use some help
Depression Support / by thebitterpoet
Last post
 September 14th, 2015
...See more I don't know what I'm doing here. I'm not good at this. I'm posting this here because need to post it somewhere. I keep trying to connect with someone and talk through my problems but it feels like a never ending cycle. I keep hearing the same advice I've heard a thousand times and I'm waiting for it to stick and it just won't. I've been dealing with depression since I was a kid, used to have extreme anxiety. Since i've "become an adult" I keep finding myself sinking lower and lower into my own sadness and it sickens me. I get so angry at myself for not being strong enough to free my mind from all the cynical self destructive bull$#!T constantly filling my thoughts. I know I'm not the person I should be. I know I'm not as strong as I can be and I can feel all the time I'm spending in stasis being flushed down the drain. For a long time I considered suicide. The only reason I never went through with it is because despite all my pain, I do have family and friends who truly care about me even if they have no real notion of how deep my depression runs and as angry and confused as I get I could never bear with the thought of causing them more pain than I already have. There was a few years recently were this feeling went away due to my first serious relationship with an awesome person that has since ended and in the last few months I can feel myself slipping back into this terrible frame of mind. I'm struggling with mental and physical health, my identity and general purpose in life. If anyone reads this and is willing to talk with me about how to beat this thing I could use some help...
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