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thisisspbok
1,343 M Little Steps 4
PathStep 12 Compassion hearts42 Forum posts6 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeMay, 2022 Member sinceJuly 19, 2015
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Safety & Knowledge at 7 Cups / by thisisspbok
Last post
 August 19th, 2015
...See more guess i'll tell you guys about me and my life but theres not much to tell, and its kind of sad and borning .... im 26 yr old black woman, i have live with my mom all my life on account of my learning / mental disabiltys. i have been in spical ed classes since middle school, and once i had started high school it was called Occ. prep. i have graduated in 2007 i have not worked since then and im wandering if i can get finantcel help. i have a drivers licencs but no car, my moms bf has a car but its stick shift so if we have to go anywhere he has to take us. ...we need a car bad... as i said i live with my mom all my life... i keep the house clean and she cooks... she was married but devorced my father. now me and mom live with her boyfriend who i hate very very much. they both drink, and are heavey achocalices. moms BF is a very mean drunk and will belittle her and verblly abuses her, then the next day well pretend like it never happend. this cycal goes on at least once a week on a good week and 3 times or more on a bad one...i think thats part why i hate him so much, how can i care for some one who treach my mom like shit and the pretends he never did it, and thens try to buy his way back into your favor? he also likes to pretend he's black ( i.e... he know more about blacks then we do thus this makes he black by default. ) he will never know what its like for us. i have no kids, and i have never been married. i and single. i have had little too no romancit life. i have had sex but only a few times in my life so im not very good at it. i can't remember the last time i had a boyfriend. i am bi / pan ( bisexual and pansexual ). i have never dated or been with a woman. i did fall in love with a close friend but he didn't feel the same way and the heart brake has made me afraid to put myself out there and date. so i dont date. i feel my learning disabilty has a lot to do with me not dating. i feel i have nothing to bring to the other person.... i am a Latter Day Saint ( mormon ) im inactive ( i don't go to the church but im still a member. ) i have horribal cavatys and chip and broken teeth. i dont smile showing my teeth for that reason, there painful and very ugly to look at so i don't show my teeth to any one. i smile without showing them. of course i have no money to fix them or even to get them pulled to stop the pain. i have a lot of self haterid and i have in the pass been a self harmer ( cuts arms and legs ) i stopped selfharming but the sadness depression, and lonelyness hasn't gone. nothing ever really changes in my life, and im to stupid to know how to change it. i have ask my mom to help me get started on ganing a disability check, but im unsure how far this will go. i feel so lost and alone, very, very lonely.... i have no job no money no friends no love life no talents or skills no home no car i have no life this is my story that i have no story... thank you for reading what ever the hell this is....
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help?
Safety & Knowledge at 7 Cups / by thisisspbok
Last post
 July 28th, 2015
...See more i think my post got deleted an I don't know why...some one help?
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