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trekkingTranquility23
1 374 M Embraced 3
Today I am blessed with a new day.
PathStep 11 Compassion hearts69 Forum posts11 Forum upvotes47 Current upvotes47 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2025 Member sinceJuly 30, 2025
Bio

I am a mom of 2 wonderful girls.  My oldest 20 my youngest 6.  Yes you see the age difference correctly.  There are some emotional issues I need to work through, in order to break these patterns in my life.  I will answer any questions that are asked, as long as you promise to be honest in your response.  I have thick skin, I need just honest answers about what I am not seeing in any given situation, not seeking extra  validation.  I do love listening to people and helping people, but I can be to be blunt at times.  I never intend to hurt feelings, or make people mad, but I can point things out in your life, that you are not ready to face.  But I do it with love.  I guess that's what I am looking for in anyone willing to listen.  

Love Music about 98% of all music, Im an 80s baby so I was raised on it all

Like to read, mainly Non-fiction, anything that will make you rethink about any situation or about your self

I'm Artsy Fartsy  which means I love to do all things crafts, diy, etc.... mainly for fun the bigger the mess I make the more fun I have

Up to learn anything, if you stop learning, you stop growing, I will teach my self anything if I'm interested in doing so

Very open minded and understanding, but also love to make others think about how they think about themselves

Need to work through past family emotional issues, gaslighting, sociopathic and narcissistic,  parent of a childhood cancer survivor lots of stuff not dealt with there, and picking my life up at 42.  

Just Breath


Recent forum posts
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Emotional Rollarcoaster
35 & Over Community / by trekkingTranquility23
Last post
August 24th, 2025
...See more Normally I don't really like celebrating birthdays, I feel like its more of a social construct and obligation to make someone feel special on one day only, but if you really loved them then you would celebrate them most days in small ways.  The older i get, the more I see that buying presents/cards for someone feels more like an obligation because its "their" day, and in a year they won't even remember what you got them because it usually isn't a truly thought out gift, and the more your circle of acquaintances grow the more money you spend on a card that will get tossed in a corner, or a gift that is not what they really wanted anyways.  And if you are like me it feels like there is at least 1-3 bdays a month of someone you know, then obligations feelings kick in and its a mad scramble to get something because everyone else they know has. (I hope all that made sense) and Im not against it if that's what you like than you do you.  No judgement to each their own. Well today is my birthday, and my emotions are all over the place about it today.  And I guess if I am being honest with myself, Im *** because my life is in shambles and I can't seem to get out of this ongoing rut in my life and its really starting to *** me off.  At 43, I have no job, my kids live with their dad,  I have a car that's been sitting in the driveway for a year because I jumped the gun on buying it and now cant drive it because it needs work to pass emissions to get a tag, I need dental work done, and no insurance, and the list goes on and on.  And I know im leaving in this season to learn some kind of *** lesson, I just wish I could see what that lesson is so I can move on.   And to top it off, my narcissistic mother, who I have not spoken to in over 3 years, gives my daughter 50 bucks for my bday present.  First wtf, she has spent 100s of 1000s of dollars pulling my sister out of her mishaps over the years, and when I "fell off the pedestal" she wanted to have me arrested for kidnapping (long story, but it really didn't concern her and that's why we no longer talk) and she thinks 50 bucks is gonna make things just hunky dory.  Secondly, she is my mom, and the amount off obligation she put on me to help raise my nephews, was ridiculous, when she caused the mess in the first place, and her emotional abuse is never ending.  Anyways, that is another topic for another day. Well I actually feel alot better now that most of it is off my chest.  I know Im all over the place but I needed to type it out before I lost my emotions again.   Thank you for reading and letting me vent!
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New Member
50 & Over Community / by trekkingTranquility23
Last post
August 23rd, 2025
...See more Just popping in to say Hi.  I am new to the platform.  Needed a space to vent and release with out the fear of judgement.  So hello to everyone and hope you all are having a good day.
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New Memeber
Journals & Diaries / by trekkingTranquility23
Last post
August 4th, 2025
...See more I'm taking a leap of faith here and joined in hopes to relieve some of the built up thoughts in my head.  I need somewhere to post really just to ***, and vent so I don't let the anger consume me.  It sucks to realize at 43 those that are supposed to be the closest to you, my 'family" are the ones you distrust the most.  Its been a long road, and I need a place to be able to discuss it process it and release it with out the fear of judgement, but also need someone to point out the faults of my own that I'm not seeing.  With all that said what is the best way to do that in these app?  
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