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tryingtoheal2025
1 72 M Embraced
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts11 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes5 Current upvotes5 Age GroupAdult Last activeJuly, 2025 Member sinceJuly 25, 2025
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I am in the darkest place I have ever been before in my life at 56 years of age
General Support / by tryingtoheal2025
Last post
 July 26th, 2025
...See more I lost my job 6 years ago, during Covid.  Was never able to find comparable work and have done gig work for the last 2 years which helped but then I had car issues and had to stop for right now.  I am worried to death about exhausting all my retirement savings in the next few years and can barely sleep as I cant think about anything else.  I am on medication and have a psychiatrist, my medication is not that great, and I have tried several with no success really.  I was a heavy cannabis user for the last few years as a I way to help me cope but stopped about 2 weeks ago and have no desire to do that right now.  I have no hobbies, very few friends (most are long distance), and cant even watch tv or sleep with all this on my mind it overwhelms me.  I am considering Ketamine treatments but need to wait a few more weeks to start consulting with doctors on that to make sure the THC passes through my system as I am sure they will screen me before accepting me as a patient. I have never been so scared in life, it has me paralyzed.  Both of my parents are on their last leg as are my wifes parents, and I feel all that coming at me. I am so overwhelmed, I feel like the walls are closing in on me and I am on a clock at this point.  
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