Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
unassumingHuman8249
1 5,782 M Moving Along 1
PathStep 32 Compassion hearts651 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes1 Current upvotes1 Age GroupAdult Last activeMay, 2026 Member sinceJuly 24, 2015
Bio
Recent forum posts
unassumingHuman8249 profile picture
Frustrated with coping the loss of my mom
35 & Over Community / by unassumingHuman8249
Last post
 April 9th, 2021
...See more My mom could be cruel at times. One of the last things she told me is that I'm a "stupid brainwashed moron". She used to send me garbage in the mail. Once even going so far as to take a photo of a bunch of garbage arranged as something and to tell me I was in the photo. I felt like she was calling be garbage. She said I was blowing it out of proportion and being too sensitive. Others say it was a creative art choice and I should be proud for her to be my mother and for her to use garbage to portray me. She used to cut pictures of garbage bags off garbage boxes and send them to me as a post card, or send me letters written on shoe insert guides with the old packaging stuffed in there envelope. Sometimes she would send me gifts of baby toys because she thinks of me as a child still and she wants grandkids. I cannot have kids. This was just downright offensive, and I couldn't ever tell if she was calling me a child or of she was nagging me for grand kids which she knew I could not give her. Nobody knows what to say to me about my relationship with her. Now that she's gone I'm a little glad she's gone but I feel so guilty for doing so because she was my mom. I'm sad a lot, depression symptoms coming back again. I'm seeing a therapist but that's a slow process you finish the intake and I think I just want to not feel so alone in this, but I'm an only child. My dad flat out told me he is disinterested in helping anyone other than himself with trying to process any kind of emotion. My husband doesn't know what to do and I just feel so lonely. It's affecting my relationship with my husband because we're not communicating well anymore. He's not understanding what I say often and I'm frustrated. He's checking out and just on his phone all the time working his butt of but making no money and bills are piling up and I'm overwhelmed in general. Please just someone tell me you've been through grief and financial strain during covid isolation and that it gets better because I'm not seeing how life is going to do anything other than get worse. Tldr; I'm struggling with my mother's death because she was mean to me and I feel like it's bringing up old wounds and self esteem issues she caused. This is causing relationship issues with my husband. My husband is coping by ignoring me and I'm lonely, isolated, overwhelmed and bills are piling up.
Search more from @unassumingHuman8249
Considering Therapy?
Talk to an expert therapist
Badges & Awards
27 total badges
Hand Shake Linked Quintet Super Active Bubbly Chief Chat Honest Voice Confident Voice Strong Start Reconnect First Post Reaching out First Compassion Helpful heart Kindness personified Loving Soul Bundled Group Chimer Group Chatter Group Supporter Group Carer Supportive Smile Friendly Face Teammate Group Friend Meaghan's Heart Strong Bond I
Report an issue