venusflytrap4 Member Profile

...See more I’ve been trying to understand my relationship better, so I wanted to share some patterns I’ve noticed. My partner often stares at me when I’m on my phone and asks who I’m talking to or what I’m doing. If I don’t respond the “right” way, he gets upset, sulks, or pushes me to explain myself. At work, he sometimes lingers around me just to see who I’m near, even if I ignore him. He frequently asks me if I love him, sometimes over and over, or needs reassurance over things like bad dreams where he imagines I’ve cheated. If I don’t reassure him exactly how he wants, he spirals or gets moody. He’ll touch me in ways that make me uncomfortable, like rubbing my leg or jokingly touching my privates, and if I react negatively, he sulks or acts like I’m overreacting. Recently, when I ignored him staring at me and kept typing on my phone, he ripped my headphones off my head and hid them behind his back, demanding to know who I was talking to(I was literally just typing in my notes). Another time, he asked me repeatedly to get him a fork, and when I kept saying no, he crawled onto the bed over me, grabbed my stomach hard, and through his teeth said he “felt too uncomfortable to go upstairs.” When I try to bring up issues, he downplays them or flips it around, making me feel like I’m the one who’s overreacting. He’ll say things like, “I just want things to be like they used to be,” instead of actually addressing what I bring up. On top of all that, he spends most of his time playing games on his computer. Even when our daughter needs attention, he often hides out in the bathroom, naps, or just leaves me to handle everything alone. I’m not sure what to call this or how others would view it, but I wanted to see what people think when they hear these behaviors described.

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