How to Handle Life Transitions?

Our life often does not go smoothly. We like to slip carelessly, unprepared or overwhelmed from section to section, including minor or major crises. There is also potential in these "life transitions"; well, or at least we could make it a little easier. That is why I have some tips for you on how to better manage these transitions and make new sections of your life more aware. Our life is not always smooth we do not keep evolving. You do not even have to think about catastrophes and things that lead to cuts from the outside. Fractures, changes and transitional phases inherently integrated into our lives.

Babyhood, early childhood, school and education, study and work, years of adult maturity, possibly parenthood, first casualties, children's fledging, midlife crisis, caring for their own aging parents, approaching retirement, slowness Aging, weakening of the body and eventually death. Some of these phases of life go into each other relatively easily. For many, however, it also crumbles quite well in the entablature, the wheel of life struggles to set a new course, and new patterns of thought and behavior must first emerge as groaning. Now and then, there are even real crises. I have collected the following tips.

Take responsibility

You do not have to stumble blindly into your next stage of life. Young parents sometimes prepare extensively for the birth of the first child through books and courses. This does not protect them from surprises and the "shock" of actual practice. At least they should know a little better, what they expect and what they have to do.

Develop a little more mindfulness for yourself and your life. Where are changes visible? What is wrong? What breaks away? What's new? Where are you going? Recognize the new phase of life and appreciate it for what it is, with all the possibilities that lie within it. That makes it easier.

Create room for change

Many people are against changes. And I can understand that well. I always find changes especially difficult when I've loved what I'm developing away from or giving up / losing. Others quarrel with the one to which they are evolving - the departure of children, aging, (retirement) retirement: what is the point of life for a passionate mother when the children are gone? How to accept the disadvantages of old age when identifying with the youth?

Clean up, gut and make room

If something new should or wants to find its place, something old must give way. This is a rush wisdom that is often overlooked. Make room for this new one. Some use, for example, a move to clear out properly, to clear away what they no longer means, and to adjust to the new living and housing conditions.

Try to let go, mourn and finish

Not everything cleared away voluntarily or lightly. The house that has been built with so much sacrifice and dedication; the people whom one found sympathetic, closed in the heart or loved; the profession that gave you everything. Even the loss of a life phase or role in life can mourned.

Try to learn to let go. Always ask yourself: Is what I am doing here good for you? Or does it cause frustration, worry, harm and pain? Does it still have any meaning? Is it still in my power to hold?

Be mindful, pay attention to your own wishes and goals

Nobody has said that you have to accept the changes and transitions of life, whether coming from the outside or rather from the inside, or both. Develop mindfulness for yourself and your life again: what depresses and frustrates you, what are you missing? What really counts for you? What inspires you?

Develop and train your "beginner spirit"

I think of a small episode: After Christmas, I was swimming for the first time since time immemorial in our indoor pool. I remembered my youth. And I had to think involuntarily: Gosh, now I'm over 40 and I'm back to building something new. Should not one slowly become "more solid" at this age and enjoy the fruits of his life? Do I have to think of myself as a teenage teenager who still has not "made it"? Well, undoubtedly, there are "more stable" CVs than those of authors or creatives, who often follow their bias rather than looking for a good pad for the next few decades in a large (and supposedly safe) firm. But do not be fooled: Only very few of them still get past cuts and changes in these times. And there are more and more people who need to build or build something new with 40, 50, 60, 70 or 80.For a long time I wrote for quizlet, and there was a lot of "bad times" in my life. What helps then, some authors call the "beginner's spirit". In other words, you are practicing to consciously discover, admit and promote this new. As the saying goes, "every beginning has a magic in it". It is the willingness to develop the childlike curiosity, the amazement and the openness for this beginning; to always be able to get involved in new things or to change the old again.

Retrieve missing skills

Do you still need new knowledge and knowhow for the way? Where can you then acquire this know-how? Or do you lack specific information? Where could you find these then? Or could certain so-called "metacompetencies" help you? How can you develop these then?

Promote your courage and confidence

The self-confidence I already mentioned above with the beginner spirit: As a rule, we humans are afraid of new, unknown situations. This applies to everyone, one less, the other less. We do not want to leave the safe haven, we do not want to be hurt, we do not have to put up with our efforts and, if at all, we want to start anew on Mama's hand.

Incidentally, the latter was not a joke: In general, your "inner child" will also contact you, cringe, have reservations and want to be reassured. You will have to take on "Mama's Protection" yourself or, more precisely, your adult self. For example, when it comes to fears, ask yourself: "Which part of me is currently speaking? How old is the voice that is afraid there? "If it is the little child in you, then lovingly take it by the hand and give it courage.

Train your willpower

In addition to courage and self-confidence, a little willpower could not hurt. Some people have them by nature, sometimes maybe a little more than they would be good for them. (I'm one of them.) Others might need a bit more support in that.

Give your soul time

Two years ago I got a small calendar from my neighbor. And I think for the month of January or February there was a very beautiful saying that seemed very fitting to me then, in the midst of my own upheaval: Two hikers lay high on the deck in the snow-capped mountains, enjoying the winter sun. And below it was something like, "Give your soul time to catch up with you."

In other words, plans and actions are good. Being aware of a period of life and transition is good. But our soul needs time to cope with these changes and process them. Give it to her.