What should I do? Unsure about having AD(H)D.

Hello, everyone, I would really appreciate some input on if my life or things sound like I have ADHD or ADD. I read @GrahZeymahzin post through and through and I wanted to have some context and talk about what symptoms I am experiencing and if they fit.

First of I am U.S. Air Force Active duty so if I do test for AD(H)D I can no longer have my job(I will go more into this) and my stepmom is a therapist and has always thought I have had it but I want to get a full picture so you guys can have an educated opinion first off here is my answers to the questions on @GrahZeymahzin post:

--> Have you had anything to drink recently?

It is early morning so I had a coffee I'm a bit jittery so I'm not surprised

--> Have you eaten in the past three hours?

not yet it is about 1000 and I woke up at 630ish

--> Have you showered today?

Yes

--> Have you stretched your legs today?

No, that's a good idea

--> Have you been compassionate to someone today?

I live alone/have a hard time expressing myself so no

--> Have you danced today?

Why would I? how is this a question.

--> Have you had social interaction today?

Plan to, haven't yet also because of current events I cant to outside but I am on discord a lot!

--> Have you seen a therapist recently?

June 2019 for helping me deal with my ex and feelings left over from that relationship

--> Have your medications changed recently?

I can't take medication

--> Are you dressed?

After my shower, I changed of course, but I am kind of used to wearing the same clothing for a couple of days at a time unless I get too funky.

--> Are you resisting going to sleep at night?

Sometimes, sometimes my job makes me switch to a night shift with little to no notice. The military has pretty much shown my sleep issues even harder sometimes I randomly pass out and at random times during the day, I feel very fatigued.

--> Do you feel ineffective?

Sometimes, however, I put so much pressure on myself that I don't allow it.

--> Do you feel unattractive?

I haven't had a date in two years I find this question uncomfortable but yes pretty much all the time

--> Do you have trouble making decisions?

Absolutely pretty much every day even for what food I want to eat. I am approaching my third year in the military and my goals have changed so much

--> Have you overexerted yourself recently?

Being in my carer field feels like the definition of overexertion. While it isn't physical it requires a lot of mental fortitude that I learned throughout my time in

--> Have you felt bad for a week or more?

Since therapy, I have learned the skill of asking for help and knowing if something is really wrong with me. Today was rough and the day before that my youngest sister(13) opened up about how toxic my mother is and how she was changing her sexuality. A rather big day but regardless I haven't felt anything so drastic that I needed help since therapy.

Here are some other symptoms I am experiencing in my day to day life:

Sometimes I think of something important and then I completely blank on it. For those who have seen the first harry potter movie, it's like when Neville picks up his remebral(the little orb thing) The whole gimmick of the object is that it goes red when you forget something and sometimes I do forget stuff and I can remember it is important but I can't remember what. This has caused me to miss homework and sometimes even volunteer work that I signed up for because I forgot what was going on that day.

Another thing is that I will put off tasks I need to take care of for example I have been meaning to call my college for the past 10 days and sign up for a new class. another example is I need to order new glasses and while these tasks aren't hard I keep putting them off.

When I am playing a game or fixing something I go into this hyper fixation like mode. While useful I have missed full-on phone calls and stuff I should be paying attention to when I'm like this. I wouldn't say it is extreme but for an example, my dorm has a lock on it and I went out to turn my truck on because it was rather snowy I forgot my keys and I forgot to unlock my door so I locked my phone and keys in my room. I don't know if general forgetfulness is something people with AD(H)D experience but I would love some insight.

Now back to the Air Force

The AF for me was an escape from my home(s) and an escape from paying a bunch of college debt. I would have gotten tested for AD(H)D before if it wasn't going to hurt my selection. I have a plan to go be a nurse and if I don't make the AF's nursing program I am switching over the air national guard to pay for my nursing school (I don't have a AA and I want to save my GI bill) and then maybe I can get tested. My personal theory is as I've grown up I have learned how to mask my possible hyperactivity along with some of my other emotions and that's why it is really hard for me to say YES I for sure have it or NO I do not have it. Unfortunately, this isn't as easy as getting a blood test and if I do get in the AF Nursing program I have to stay in for at least another five years.

One of the concerns that bother me is that I might have overlaying issues that look and sound like AD(H)D and that rather low percentage of adults with it. Part of me says I have learned to manage so far so why should I even worry about it.

Another thing to note is that my dad is undiagnosed and has just managed (in my opinion) and my youngest sister was tested and has it. When I was home and she didn't have meds I don't remember myself being like that as a kid but at the same time, I don't think I remember too well of being a kid.

So I know yall can't give medical advice but I know you can share your experiences and if mine sound similar to yours. Also curious about how medications worked per person to person I have always hated the idea that I need medication to fix something wrong with me(no offense though that's a personal opinion).

Thanks, everyone on 7cups for being here for me!