Depression Support Notes (31/07/15)

Hello, and welcome to the second instalment of the Depression Support Friday Discussion minutes! On July 31st, we held the second in a series of discussion sessions focused on depression and what its like living with it! This week, our discussion topic was on thoughts and feelings!

The first thing we asked was what the difference between thoughts and feelings was—there was a lot of discussion related to thoughts being more difficult to express than feelings, and that thoughts dont have to be connected to feelings.

@Riah67 mentioned that feelings are genuine or sincere, but thoughts can be duplicitous!

Thoughts are your mind talking and feelings are the way our soul and heart interprets our thoughts. @theGreyArea

Thoughts and feelings impact each other. I think thoughts are developed more and more logical (obviously) and feelings are more impulsive @PurpleLychee

As @MissZ very elegantly put it, Feelings are always okay, they are never wrong, because they are there.

Next, we looked at negative thinking and how it interacts with your perspectives, particularly on your sense of self, world and future. Many of the responses we received for this were focused around one or all of these things, and the list was pretty extensive. There were a lot of feelings of self-doubt and self-deprecation, and views revolving around feeling worthless or having a dismal or disappointing future. Some comments that really struck a chord were:

That i am excempt from having a bright future because of my bad past.... but i know this isnt true, it just sneaks in a lot

i just cant see a future for myself

I'll never accept myself. I'll just like the rest of my life in chains and self-hatred

We then explored what people felt the most difficult aspect of depression was. Loneliness, anxiety, apathy, sadness, hopelessness, fear, failure, and physical pain among other things were felt to be the most dominant feelings in depression for some.

I don't know.I'd say it's more of a particularly nasty cocktail of various things,and there not being one particularly dominating emotion. @Pbob

We brought up guilt and worthlessness next, and asked how they related to the members. There was a really interesting pattern—feelings of guilt were often associated with other people. For example, feeling guilty about feeling something and being around others, or for feeling the way they do, or for the how they felt affected others.

A lot of people felt that others, i.e. people who havent experienced depression or werent feeling down already, misunderstood the feelings. One really frequently appearing response was that actions or non-actions as a result of depression were misidentified as laziness by others, and when asked about remedies, several people mentioned that not talking about how they felt, hiding their true feelings by putting on a mask, and avoiding people were the best remedies.

& yeah, i get told im over reacting, im playing victim, im being silly or 'acting like im made of glass' so I just stay quiet now. @Hanbamble

We also talked about how negative thoughts can affect our moods and how we could challenge that negativity. Many people said that trying to think positive thoughts sometimes helped, and that trying to get motivated was a good way to power through that negativity. There was a lot of discussion about the danger of positivity, however, especially concerning how positivity could put you on a high that hurt more when you crashed than being consistently negative.

Despite all of that, there were some success stories about changing their pattern of thinking and feeling differently as a result! For some, that meant opening up even when they didnt want to, and learning that while some people still might not understand, some are still supportive!

think if the person care about you and love you they will take ur feelings seriousy and will understand them @caringHoliday92

The discussion prompted a lot of interesting commentary and some really intriguing ideas. It was so great to have so many unique perspectives and approaches to bounce off each other and see how someone struggling with similar things experienced similar and different thoughts and feelings. I wanted to thank everyone who attended for participating and making the discussion such a huge success! It was an amazing experience!

@AClockworkAlex, @AffectionateAvocado35, @ambitiousLemon83, @bdishman, @bluePillsbury, @bravelittleemily, @caringHoliday93, @Failure1, @fluffyUnicorns84, @Hanbamble, @JetSetRadio, @Lavendla, @LeahMck89, @LostInLove90, @mashedpotatoes, @MissZ, @MrsColumbo, @Nic510, @NightShad0w, @Pbob, @PenguinPower31, @persistentSugar3961, @PurpleLychee, @Riah67, @RoaringHappiness, @theGreyArea, @Vess

Weekly Challenge Corner

As you may know, we challenge you to do something at the end of each discussion! This week, its to write down any negative thoughts you catch yourself having! You can share those with us or read negative thoughts other members have shared and see if you can challenge each other here!

Here's one more thing to get your night hopping! (Click it! Trust me!)