Bloom.... aaryan

A Flying Kite, But a Broken String

Mumma

Lukka chuppi bohot hui,

Saamne aa ja na…

Kahan kahan dhoonda tujhe,

Thak gayi hai ab teri maa…

I love you so much, and I always will. But lately, I’ve been feeling so alone like I’m stuck in a place where no one really sees me, not even myself. I try to be strong in front of you because I know you already carry so much. I don’t want to be another reason for your stress. That’s why I stay quiet, why I smile when I don’t feel like it, why I say “I’m fine” even when I’m not.

But inside, I’m breaking.

Some days, I feel like I can’t live this life…

And yet, I can’t leave it either because I know how much it would hurt you.

So I stay. I breathe. I pretend.

And I keep holding on.

Even when I didn’t say it, you were always in my heart.

But I feel like I’m disappearing… into silence, into deep loneliness. I'm exhausted crying every night till I faint... I'm exhausted seeking help from my friends... I'm exhausted asking for help..... I'm exhausted hurting myself over and over again...

I just wish someone could sit next to me right now and hug me without saying anything.

I wouldn’t have to explain, you’d just know.

Kaise tujhko dikhaun yahan hai kya

Maine jharne se paani maa

Tod ke piya hai

Guccha guccha kai khwaabon ka

Uchhaal ke chhua hai

Chaaya liya bhali dhoop yahan hai

Naya naya sa hai roop yahan

Yahan sab kuch hai maa fir bhi

Lage bin tere mujhko akela…

I miss being your little boy. I miss the version of me who wasn’t this heavy, this lost.

But please know... no matter what...

Now You are the only reason I’m still here.

You are my light in all this darkness.

And I love you more than I can ever say.

~Aaryan