Depression

Today all the trees in my first are sad and weeping. I don't really know why. It all just feels so heavy. Like why am I even here? I feel like a failure, like I'm not worthy, not enough. I hate feeling this way. I am trying all the ways I know how to heal from my past that's liedd to me and told me this is who you are now. I want to be happy and free i just don't know how to get there.