Drowning

I feel like I’m drowning. Most of the time, I’m really good at controlling my emotions and I’m typically ok at making sure bad days and sad things don’t get to me, but the past few days have been so up-and-down that I haven’t been able to control anything emotionally.

It feels like everyone plans my life for me and then they ask me after they decide what they wanna do with it if it’s all right. By that point what I want doesn’t really matter anymore because everyone else has already decided.

It makes me really sick sometimes trying to pretend I’m not upset. And then when I finally do let it out and a tear comes down. I feel bad because I don’t wanna dump my emotions on everyone else.

It’s just like I’m sinking over and over again. I get a little bit back up and then I go right back down. I just need to get past this weekend and start a new week.