@redStrawberries6067 It sounds like you are going through a really difficult time, and it’s completely understandable that you’re feeling this way. When you're dealing with depression, the pressure to perform or to "feel" a certain way during significant milestones can feel like a heavy weight.
It’s important to give yourself grace. You are putting a lot of pressure on yourself to be the "happy version" of you, but it’s okay to just be the *current* version of you. Here are a few ways to approach your graduation project presentation when things feel overwhelming:
You mentioned wanting to treat it like a "normal day." That is actually a very healthy strategy. Your goal right now doesn't need to be "being happy" or "celebrating"; your goal is simply to **complete the task**. Treat the presentation as an administrative step—a box to check. Taking the emotional pressure off yourself to feel "joy" can actually make it easier to just get through the process.
When you're depressed, looking at the whole project can feel suffocating. Try to break the days leading up to it into tiny, manageable pieces:
Instead of "prepare for the presentation," focus on "format two slides today."
Instead of "worry about the aftermath," focus only on the physical act of standing up and speaking for those few minutes.
Let Go of the "Future Self" Guilt
You are worried about your future self looking back and feeling sad that you didn't enjoy this moment. But remember: your future self will also be proud that you managed to show up and get it done, even while struggling. You are fighting a battle right now that many people don't see, and showing up to defend your project despite that is an act of incredible strength. That is something to be proud of, even if it doesn't feel "happy."
Have a plan for a low-energy, comfortable space to go to immediately after. Allow yourself to just go home, turn off your phone, and rest. You don’t have to do anything else. Giving yourself permission to be "low-key" after the presentation can take away the anxiety of what to do next. I hope you will be okay soon. ❤️🤗
