I can’t do this.

@hardworkingKiwi110 Hi. I’ve been there. Three times. It feels devastating and like life will never be good again. What ends up happening is that you find ways to survive and you learn more about yourself. You’re blaming yourself right now and probably not encouraged by the idea of learning about yourself. However, there are lots of benefits to learning to be your own best friend. First YOU are always there whether you’re in a relationship or not. Second, when you strengthen your self compassion you have more compassion to give to others. When you can find calm and strength in yourself you become more attractive to others. Like it or not you must and will recover from this because there is literally nothing else to do. But first you should expect to give yourself plenty of permission to grieve. Find things that soothe you. Find things that take your mind off of this when you can. You’ll find rare bits of happiness even if they are small and last for mere seconds or minutes. Don’t dismiss those. They are proof that happiness is still something available to you. You deserve to be happy and you have much to contribute to others. Your partner may return or you will find another. Don’t be bothered if you don’t quite believe what I’m saying. You’ll move forward and learn it for yourself. Initially it will be a rollercoaster and mostly on the down side. You’ll start to feel better only to have that fade and have a string of pretty low days. But nothing lasts forever and eventually the rollercoaster stops and we get off. Our life gets warmer and our hope gets stronger. Mindfulness meditation may be something to look into. It may help you take some mini relief “vacations”. Believe it or not, if you can practice staying in the current second, you may find a burst of endorphins. It gives your brain a break from blaming your past actions or fearing what looks like a barren future. You are just not the reason this relationship failed. You have some part, sure but right now you’re mind is in super self blame mode. It’s just not helpful to replay that tape. Your future can’t be predicted by you. No matter what you imagine, none of us know what’s next. If we did we would never make mistakes. So focus on one breath in and one breath out and when your mind wanders away tell it that you’ll be back to thinking about stuff when you’re done meditating. Focus on the smallest section of time that it takes to partly breath in. Repeat the same with breathing out. If you find relief in a half a second it may be possible to find relief in one second. Relief in two seconds, maybe it stretches to four. What is a day of rest or of happiness? It’s a bunch of seconds of rest or happiness stung out in a row. You have had those days before and you’re body actually is at stasis in happiness and calm. It’s its natural state. So it is possible for us not to follow the “story” that this pain will last forever. For now, you can’t push this pain out of your mind. So don’t look for a fix to turn it off. You have to walk through it BUT you will survive AND you’ll be better for having made this journey. Sleep my friend. Tomorrow is a new day.