I don't know how to be strong
My brother is 39, unemployed, no proper work experience. Broken family, my dad is retired 68 and provides for him through his pension. I am 24 female living in Hong Kong, but don't really have a career just doing some barely survival job with no growth in this field. My brother often hits my father and accuses us of giving him the "silent treatment" and says he is ashamed of asking for money. So I told him yesterday that he needs to start earning and living his own life and stop making excuses about the family. He destroyed my sleep and made me stay awake till 7am to talk to him, I find him impossibly selfish and petulant. I'm looking at getting a lawyer to issue him an ultimatum of either an eviction notice OR have him go see a mental health professional every 2 weeks, get medicated and rehabilitate into normal society. He doesn't believe in money and doesn't want to participate in society but he also needs it the most in the family. He expects things we cannot give to him, I am so frustrated and don't know what to say I just want him to agree he was wrong hitting my dad (he never admits that!), he accused us of being manipulative but he is the manipulative one. What should I do in this situation, dealing with a mentally deranged guy, and an old dad and a *** career and nobody to help or support me?
@diplomaticPlum9973
This is a terrible situation, I'm sorry that things are going this way in your life right now, hang in there. And although I can't give advice from my side, I think that in your situation a lot of things are mixed up and you feel responsible for everything. It often happens that the youngest are the most responsible. But if you haven't done so yet, perhaps it's time to prioritize. In your situation, everything seems important, but for example, if right now it's more important for you to figure out your career - put it first and everything else - after it. Or vice versa, as you think is right. Maybe Hong Kong is not the best place for you right now, do you think? Is there an opportunity to earn more somewhere? And about your brother, you're great, you're doing your best, but you can't force him to do anything consciously. So try to accept that now you are doing the maximum and this should not affect you and prevent you from living your life at least a little calmly. Hang in there!