I dont know whats going on in my life
Hey, uhm im 16 and i need someone to talk to. I feel like I’ve given up and that thought acares me. I stopped caring about grades and honestly at this point i have stopped caring about my parents since all they do is put unfairly pressure on me and don’t think twice about how it affects me. Im in my first relationship now but im not aure i can fully trust her since at the start of our relationship she cheated but she is also the only reason i havent gone through with suicide and she sees me for me, not my mask i wear around everyone else but i still dont feel
like i can fully trust her. Im starting to give up hope again as i did before and almost ended it. I was also struggling with a codeine addiction followimg a prescription after surgery which i never told my parents about so that was a silent battle that i won but now i just feel numb and the only
time im happy is with my girl. Sometimes when im with her i remind myself of the pain she put me through and i feel like i have nothing and now im hopeless.
@16andstruggling Hello struggling, thank you for reaching out. It sounds as though things are very difficult on a number of fronts for you - you describe feeling apathetic towards both your grades and parents, while feeling pressured by them. Similarly you sound ambivalent about your relationship and describe early-stage cheating, which has left you wary of trusting. You've mentioned also painkiller addiction and being unable to disclose this to anyone; this is indeed a silent struggle and you've shown enormous courage and strength in handling this alone. Both keeping up a mask and wrestling silently with addictions place enormous mental stress on us, We become numb to protect us from further pain, so it's very easy to feel that we have nothing; that there's nothing behind the façade we show, as we retreat into one-dimensionality. However, you've shown a strong start in wanting to make changes by posting here. What else would help in fostering connections with others?
I'm hearing a lot of positives about your girlfriend - the one person you don't mask with, who sees and accepts you, and you feel happy around her. Not being able to move past hurts and reminding ourselves each time of their occurrence is rather like picking at an old scar; what would it take to resolve those feelings, to move towards trusting and build the sort of relationship you would like to have?
I've linked below to the 7cups guide to getting unstuck, which looks at thought patterns and moving beyond our ways of seeing. Hoping you continue to find a way forward, Struggling; you're always welcome on the forums, or any of the chatrooms, as well as reaching out to the listeners on here.
hey and thanks
im not sure how i could move past what she did but im trying and think its going well as for my parents I have given up on my father and my relationship as it doesnt seem he cares about my personal life or feelings in any way but my mother tries and i appreciate it. As for fostering other connections, most of my friends arent people i can trust with things like this and it feels like im alone in all tgis aside from my gf, although we all know how that went last time i fully trusted her.
@16andstruggling it's encouraging that you're trying to move beyond what happened, Struggling - I've linked below to the self help guide to forgiveness, which looks at getting past emotional hurts - this can be very healing. I hear you on the difficulties with your father; it is always tough when people don't see us, yet your mother's efforts seem to provide some redress to that. Friends are wonderful, but they fulfil only certain roles and may not be able to fully support you in this. We have dedicated teen listeners for your age group - feel free to reach out to them for additional emotional support. As ever, thank you for becoming part of our community here.
https://www.7cups.com/forgiveness/