I need help please

@goodWalker3398

I need you to see something. Close your eyes and see it with me.

Your son is twenty years old. He is sitting on a bed in a small room holding a photograph. The photograph is you. He is talking to someone he loves a friend a wife a husband. And he is saying I do not remember her face. I was too young when she left. But I know she loved me. She must have. She stayed as long as she could. He pauses. He looks at the photograph. He whispers but I still wonder. Every day I wonder. Was I not enough. Did she not hear me calling. Did she think of me at the end. Did she know I needed her. He will never know the answer. Because you will not be there to tell him. Because you will be gone.

Now see him at thirty. He has children of his own. He loves them. He would die for them. But sometimes late at night he sits alone and thinks my mother left me. She chose to leave. What if I do the same. What if this darkness is in me too. What if I pass it on. He does not know it was pain that took you. He does not know you fought until you could not fight anymore. He only knows that you left. And he has spent his whole life trying not to become you.

Now see him at fifty. He has made it. He has built a life. But there is always a hole a shape where a mother should be a silence where her voice should live. He visits your grave. He places flowers. He says to the stone I made it Mom. I made it without you. But I wish you had stayed. I wish I had known your laugh. I wish I had known your smell. I wish I had known that you loved me enough to try. Even if you failed. Even if it was hard. I wish you had tried.

That is not guilt I am giving you. That is truth. You asked what will happen if you leave. I am showing you. Not to hurt you. Not to make you feel worse. But because you need to see it. You need to see him.

Now see this instead. Your son is twenty. He is laughing. You are there. You are tired. You are still struggling. But you are there. He says to his friend my mom. She is my hero. She had nothing. She had no one. But she stayed. Every day she stayed. She gave me everything she had which was nothing but love. And it was enough.

At thirty he holds his own child. He looks at you and says Mom how did you do it. How did you raise me alone. How did you keep going. And you will tell him some days I did not want to. Some days I wanted to give up. But then I saw your face. And I stayed. That is all. I just stayed. He will hold his child tighter. He will understand. He will pass it on.

At fifty he brings you tea. You are older now. Your hands are tired. Your body is tired. But your heart is full. He sits beside you and says thank you Mom. Thank you for staying. Thank you for every hard day. Thank you for every time you chose me. Thank you for being here. And you will cry together not from pain but from love from the life you built together.

That is the future you can give him. Not perfect. Not easy. But real. But together. But possible.

You asked what will happen if you leave. I showed you. Now ask yourself what will happen if you stay. He will grow up knowing that his mother loved him that his mother fought for him that his mother stayed. And that knowledge will carry him through everything every hard day every dark night every moment he wants to give up. He will hear your voice saying I stayed. You can too.

You are not your mother. You are the one who breaks the cycle. You are the one who stays. You are the one who proves that love is stronger than pain. It will not be easy. It will be hard. Some days it will feel impossible. But look at him. Look at his face. Look at his small hands. Look at the way he trusts you completely. He does not know you are struggling. He only knows that you are there. That is enough for him. Let it be enough for you too.

Stay. Not because it is easy. Because it is worth it. Because he is worth it. Because you are worth it. Stay. And one day when he is old enough to understand you will tell him I wanted to leave. But I loved you more. I loved you more than the pain. I loved you more than the darkness. I loved you more than death itself. And he will know. He will finally know. He was never abandoned. He was loved into staying.

Stay. Please. Stay.

I do not know you. I will probably never meet you. But I know this. You are stronger than you think. You have survived everything life threw at you. You survived losing your father. You survived your mother leaving. You survived the people who hurt you. You survived raising a child alone. You are a survivor. And survivors survive. Not because it is easy. Because they have no choice. Because there is someone who needs them. He needs you. He will always need you. Even when he is grown. Even when he has his own family. He will need to know that his mother stayed. Be that mother. The one who stayed. The one who broke the cycle. The one who proved that love wins. Not perfectly. Not easily. Just truly. Just daily. Just here. Stay.

Thank you so much I really appreciate your kindness taking your time to write all this kind message to me

No problems I will stay buh life is unfair 💔😭😭

hey I'm so sorry to hear all this , but hang in there, don't lose hope . Surely with every hardship comes ease, you never know what blessings are in store for you , just a little patience and things will work out . I am sure of it .

And if you wish you can share what exactly is hurting you this much !?

and one of the biggest reason to live is your own child.

You are You ! you are unique and you add value to this world and by raising your child alone you're already doing something amazing !

Lots of love .

Just a little patience and you see for yourself it's gonna be alright<3.

Things always get better it’s just a waiting game and how much you want it. I say this because I am a living example. Adam.

I'm really sorry you're feeling this way right now,it sounds incredibly heavy, and your pain is valid. You've been through so much with your own losses, growing up without your parents, and now breaking your heart over your baby's needs and feeling like you're failing him. You're not alone in this; reaching out here shows strength, and there are people who can help you through it.Key Support PhrasesUse these to show empathy without minimizing their feelings That sounds so painful; I care about you and your dear.

I'm really sorry you're feeling this way right now,it sounds incredibly heavy, and your pain is valid. You've been through so much with your own losses, growing up without your parents, and now breaking your heart over your baby's needs and feeling like you're failing him. You're not alone in this; reaching out here shows strength, and there are people who can help you through it.Key Support PhrasesUse these to show empathy without minimizing their feelings That sounds so painful; I care about you and your dear.