Just life
Life to me seems pointless at this point, I recently lost my mom, which I don't know how to feel about at all. I was too late, I was to late to tell her I loved her one last time, I was too late to say goodbye and give her one last hug. I feel small, like no one who has no one, I have my husband but he just told me he doesn't feel like I love him or show him love. Which I will always love him and always be here for him but right now I'm not even here for myself, I feel distant and cold. I feel alone and I thought he would understand that but I guess he doesn't. I'm tired, so unbelievably exhausted. I keep telling myself don't give up to keep trying but every time I try everything just gets worse. Every night my dreams.just go deeper and deeper into what I'm feeling it's terrifying. I can't peacefully sleep and I can't peacefully live. How does one go about fixing that? I was in therapy my whole life from 7 years old to 17 years old and then I just stopped going, I feel like I can't help myself and neither can anyone else. I feel as though I'm too deep in whatever someone would call this to get help. I'm scared to reach out to anyone because no one likes me. I've always ruined everything in my life absolutely everything to the point I have absolutely no one..
Losing a loved one, especially a parent, can be incredibly painful and overwhelming. It's natural to feel a range of emotions, including sadness, guilt, and loneliness. Please know that it's okay to feel the way you do, and you're not alone in your grief. The feeling of being too late to express your love or say goodbye is a common one, but it's important to remember that your mom knew you loved her. Love transcends words and actions, and she would have felt your love throughout her life. Grief can affect relationships, and it's understandable that you may feel distant and overwhelmed right now. Let him know that you're struggling and that you need his support.
