rant

i don’t really know how to talk about my feelings. i’m really tired, my best friend doesn’t respond to me anymore, she’s tired of me now. i’m scared to ask for help, my dad used getting a therapist as a threat to shut up. honestly, i feel completely unloveable. people have said they love me but it feels so empty and i have never believed it. i just want someone to care, to comfort me and tell me it’ll be okay, im here. i just want support but i’m screaming while i’m drowning in quicksand and not able to move. i have no motivation to do anything but still feel disgusting when i don’t move. i don’t know what to do anymore