[tw: abusive parents, suicide]I just want to say...

there's nothing like being in a high stress environment the entire day and always getting yelled/insulted at by my parents, and when I finally got time to chill for 30 minutes, I got yelled at again by both parents, then finally right before dinner time, I've had enough and just went straight to my room, locked the door, had a breakdown, fell asleep crying, only for my dad to bust in yelling at me saying he disowns me and from this point on I no longer have a father.

Yeah, peak parenting right there. This has always been the case since I was like 9. I'd get yelled at, then I'd have a breakdown, then one or both parents say they disown me, and I'll go down a deeper spiral where I'll eventually have to pull myself out before I hurt myself one way or another. Just like all those other times, they never ask why I'm feeling the way I feel. They just immediately assume I'm a lazy, spoiled brat who thinks she can get away with anything just because her parents "love" her. No. *** no. I didn't even know what the word for love was in my native language up until highschool when my friend asked me how to say "I love you" in my language and I was left *** embarrassed cause I had no *** clue cause it has never been said to me. Ever. I had to find out from googling.

I changed religions at around 12. My dad found out and beat me then once again says he disowns me and throws me out of the house at 10pm, not before telling me I am destroying our family by not believing in the same god as him. How could I when the religious father beats me, verbally and emotionally abused me my entire life? How does he expect me to believe in his god when the believer treats a *** child like garbage.