Dealing with Depression and feeling so alone
Last year I was so happy and felt so content like everything was just perfect. Boys liked me, I had so many friends, my teachers loved me, and I was so confident. This year I don't know what happened to me. I feel so out of place and like I'm stuck in this awful funk that I just can't seem to shake off. Over the summer I lost one of my "friends" who I was beginning to fall in love with after he found out and said "We shouldn't talk anymore, it'll help you get over me". I was so heartbroken and still am. Whenever I see him I just feel so broken inside. On top of that, I feel like this year I have no friends in any of my classes which I should be happy about because it allows me to focus on schoolwork but I just feel so lonely when the teachers say "Partner up!" and I have no one to go to. Literally all the people in my class are popular or druggies which I really do not belong with. My parents keep trying to tell me to stay strong but I feel so alone and weak. I'm losing all my friends, no boys like me, no one makes an effort to even talk to me, no matter how hard I try, I hate my teachers because I came from all honors to regular classes and feel like a failure and don't fit in. I'm just so sad and I feel like the world wouldn't even miss me if I was gone. I know suicide isn't an option, because I love my family but they expect so much of me it is so stressful. My mom grew up as a failure to her family because she got pregnant and had me so she says she is counting on me to be amazing, and I want to be amazing for her but it's just so stressful and overwhelming. On top of that my parents are divorced and everything is just so stressful. Any tips how to help me cope or any advice about how to make me happier? I just feel like I'm ready to cry for no reason and I honestly think I'm depressed but no one agrees. My mom just says "You're just sad you don't have any classes with your friends" but in my head I'm having these awful suicidal thoughts and I just feel so empty and lost. I don't know what is wrong with me. I feel so awful
Elle, you have to leave all these negative thoughts about how all of these people feel about you. Most likely the boy you were falling in love with wasnt really a friend to begin with. When i was in high school, i wanted to ask this girl i liked to go out with me. She was with 3 or 4 girlfriends and made me ask her in front of them. When she turned me down they all started laughing. I was so humiliated. That same girl wanted me to go out with her after i graduated. Needless to say, i turned her down flat out. People like them arent worth wasting your time on.
I can also relate to your feeling alone in school. I didnt feel like i had any friends then either. But let me tell you something that somebody once told me, most people you know in high school, once youre out 5 years you will know hardly any of them anymore. So you study your butt off while youre in there and i promise you after youre out things will get better. Some of the people i know that were popular arent doing as well as me. Theyre the druggies you spoke of. They cant keep a job,are in jail or whatever. Theyre not happy. You concentrate on being the most awesome you you can be. Get rid of all of those negative feelings and feelings of suicide. I know its hard to live up to the expectations of your parents, but if you keep yourself squared away, take care of yourself, and dont end up like those other people, i bet your parents will be awfully proud of you. I know i would be if you were my daughter. Take care of yourself and keep your head up!!! :):):)
@whyme11 This helped me so so so much. I feel great knowing I am not alone and that others have experienced similar difficulties. Thank you so much for all your advice, I really appreciate it so much. I can't stress enough how much better I feel after reading this and I really appreciate it so much. I wish you all the best, thank you again :)
Love, Elle
@elle1234567, I just saw there was an update to this thread. I am so glad to hear that the words of David and myself helped you out so much. Dont ever let someone dictate totally how you feel. Im not saying to totally discount people. I just think by the way you were talking was that the guy you liked was affecting you too much. You will learn in time and situations who your true friends are. Like I said, I am so glad youre doing much better. I knew you could do it!!!
Boys can be jerks some times. But I'm sure Elle, you're an amazing girl. Also, I've been in your shoes before, I still am. And whyme11 gave great advice. Yeah, focus on yourself. If you want a selfish point of view as to why you shouldn't get a boyfriend or girlfriend, I asked my friend why he didn't have a girlfriend and he said all the money I make is my money. It's funny but it's true. If you want to a boyfriend or girlfriend you need money to take them out and you need to pay attention to them. And I read an article about people being in relationships and it said people in relationships are usually less productive.
So I say you use this time to grow yourself. I'm in with you, and plenty of others are in it with you. Trying to grow themselves while also trying to push away the negativity. But just take it one step at a time. You'll do fine and if you need anything, I'll be here and so will the community of 7 Cups of Tea.
I'm struggling just as you. But we'll get through it together. There really is no way to cope with it, just people who are in it with you can understand you and can help each other through it all. So, Cheers! To our dreams, our future, our goals, and to each other.
- a guy that cares :)
@davidsproutstran
I'm sorry for replying so late, but I really appreciate your response :) I feel much better after all your advice and that's exactly what I have been doing these past few weeks. My grades have been great, I'm making new ones, and I feel happy because I realize that I have to love myself before I'm ready to love anyone else. Thank you so much and best of luck to you with all your endeavors.
Love, Elle
Thanks Elle. :) I'm glad to hear that. I'm on the same track and we'll grades aren't too good, but I'm still headed in the right direction. Hope to hear from your success and accomplishments soon. - David
I'd love to speak with you more, try to contact me. You gave me great advice :)
@elle1234567, which person were you talking to? I wouldnt have any problem talking to you, but realize you could have been talking to David. Have a great day.
Whyme, I think she's talking to you. I'm just the average joe, so why me? heheTry to contact her, make her have a nice day. Be you, because you are you and no one can do it better than you.
Hi! I don't think I give you great advice just what you needed to hear, and it was the right timing and I just simply opened up my heart so you know that I'm here too. But thanks! That made my day haha. How are you Elle?
I'm a Listener now.. pst! still davidsproutstran. Just rearrange the name, I know... Such Creativity you say. well, all the good ones were taken. haha
I'm so sorry for the late response!! I was actually talking to David but thank you both so much :)
