Depressed and scared to talk about it
Hi
I'm depressed i know that and have been a long time but the thing is i want to tell my mom about it but i'm scared of her reaction...i have been giving her hints here and there but she doesn't seem to notice them or she ignores them..and one thing getting in my way of telling her is also my anxiety..so i'm really in a dead end with this but i really want to and i also need to tell her but it's hard and i don't even know how should i bring it up to her..so if any of you have tips on what should i do i'm on all ears.
Have you tried telling someone besides your mom first? That practice conversation might give you strength. If that won't work try to find a quiet moment and just do it. Tell her you are scared and need help. She loves you and wants to help I am sure. The longer that you wait the harder it can become.@EyesSoEmpty
You can do it! Let us know how it goes.@bestVase7265
@bestVase7265 I have told my two best friends and it didn't help at all...and my mom is kinda hard to get along with so i'm scared of her reaction and she is usually in a bad mood and i don't want to tell her when she is in that state of mind..
I liked the idea of writing her a letter. It can be easier to get your feelings on paper. Also, people your own age are not always the most understanding. Do you have an adult at school you can go to?@EyesSoEmpty
@bestVase7265 I don't go to school.. And there isn't any other adults in my life at the moment.. Also even if i wrote i think i would chicken out when i would be giving her the letter...
The key is writing the thoughts down, even if you don't send it. There are lots of caring people out there, but you have to just keep looking until you find the right one. Have you tried your doctor?@EyesSoEmpty
@bestVase7265 I don't have a doctor...Finland is a bad blace to be when you have depression because it's difficult to get help if you want any...
@EyesSoEmpty Like someone mentioned below, have you tried talking about it with someone who wasn't your mom but you believe might be more understanding. I don't know about your mother but my mom and I have a really complex relationship. While she is there for me and tries her best to support me, she is not naturally a compassionate person and often says things that are more harmful than helpful. It's easy to make things about her rather than me and she has a habit at making my problems seem miniscule and that I have nothing to worry about.
So within the last couple of months, I decide that she would not be the first person to tell about my depression. Instead I first decided to go to a school psychologist (6 months ago) and then started revealing my anxiety and depression to my friends (1-2 months ago). Eventually last week I decided to tell my dad (who is slightly better than with the whole listening thing than my mom) who in turn told my mom. My parents are more understanding about my anxiety issues rather than my depression, and while I did have a conversation about it the other day with her she still seems to not truly understand but is trying to be supportive (like that why should I have problems, and how could you think this way, etc). Basically I knew what to expect from her in her response, so even though it wasn't great, at least it wasn't unexpected.
@FantasiaSweetShock My mom is kinda like yours and thats kinda why i'm scared to tell her...she can be nice but other times she can be..how should i say it? Selfsentered and hard to get along with....and i have told my only two best friends but it didn't help at all...and i can't tell my dad because he passed away (no need to say "sorry for you loss" i didn't like him and still don't)
Also everytime i think "now i tell her" she somehow gets pissed out of nowhere (many times because of my two brothers) and i don't want to tell her when she in that state of mind...so it's really hard..
@EyesSoEmpty So if you don't mind me asking, why did it not go well with your friends?
@FantasiaSweetShock i did go well it's just that it didn't help at all...
This is just a suggestion, and I don't know if it will work for you but when I struggled to tell my mum through my voice I wrote everything down and told her "in your time could you please read this, and I will truly appreciate it, love you mum" just an idea
@MeganEvans16 I have tried coming up a letter but i just don't seem to put everything into words...and i probably would chicken out when i would be giving it to her...thanks tho for the idean.
I'm pretty new to this so I'm just going to jump in. I'm pretty sure I've been suffering from a depression called dysthymia and I've also been diagnosed with anxiety. For years I have tried to deal with it on my own, but lately it's been too much. I've never necessarily been suicidal, but I'm afraid that one day I'll see it as my only option . I'm too scared to talk to my mom (my only parent) about it. She's given up so much for me and the last thing I want is to disappoint her. Lately I've been struggling and instead of my friends/family trying to help me they just seem burdened by me. I don't want to die, but I can't help but feel like I could just start walking away and never turning back. I don't know where I'll go or what I'll do, but at least I know everyone won't have to feel guilty; they could just move on. This just seems like the better option. I could just disappear and no one would care.
Is it wrong for me to not want them to not worry about me, but at the same time want them to care?