Depression, Relationships, Authenticity, Society - How does it work?
I'm curious if anyone can give me some insight around relationships, closeness, and vulnerability. I know this is a touchy, and personal topic, so I won't be offended if I get no responses.
I've suffered from depression my whole life. I spent almost 20 years "living with it". Ive since gotten tons of help. I've spent the last three years taking active steps to live a more fulfilled, well-rounded life.
Background being given, I wish to enter into a relationship, when I try, it seems to be impossible. I've chatted with people on this topic, and the best answer I got was because dating these days is a game. I'm not sure this is entirely true, but I do see aspects of it in dating culture.
The thing is, even if I know the game, I don't want to play it. It feels unauthentic to me, personally.
If I don't play the game, well, I'm alone.
You see my problem....
I just spent years learning, exploring, and finding myself, now I'm being told, don't be that....(at least, for the sake of dating)
Any, and all, insights would be appreciated and accepted. Thanks.
@Amindfulbalance
Hi!
Yup yup yup yup - can completely see what you're going through.
For me personally, I'm in a relationship but beforehand I was in the same position. I was having friends that were dating and dating to me was inauthentic - learning how to 'play the game', be eager but not too eager, be chased but not run away. The whole idea of it was confusing, silly (to me) and made me stear away from it. So I did.
I didn't worry about tinder apps and tried to ignore being the third wheel at parties. Anything that felt too 'game-like' I ended up backing away from.
and now, I'm in a relationship. I started up with a chat online with no intention of a relationship and it slowly grew.
This is a story a lot about me but I'm saying it because I think it can happen to you too. There are people out there who are in the same boat - who aren't interested in games and just want a geniune relationship filled with authenticity and vulnerability. Dating is portrayed to be a game but it doesn't have to be. I think it can just be about navigating through it all to find someone who sees what you see too.
