Help

Im 20, im a business owner, a step dad and a ex husband. I lost my woman. Lost my baby girls. Lost my main job. Lost my clientel. And im about to loose my truck and my home.

I've been suicidal for years but the pain and stress is winning im to scared to ask for help. Everytime i do im judged for seeking help. Or told im saying it to control no. Im saying it because im hurting.