Hostile work environment
Hi Im Heather and Im new here. I have been working for a property management company for almost 9 years. They hired a girl who has no experience, makes tons of mistakes, made a mess of the office, writes on her desk like a child. I worked my ass off to build this office! She is rude to everyone, fights with tenantz daily, no one likes her, tenants, workers, etc. Only my boss because she has connections with the city. I have tried every which way to get along with this woman. She plays games all day & is on facebook while I am busting my ass working. Plays music like we are in a club, leaves early, comes late, taken more days off than I can count & everytime I say something to my boss I end up being the bad guy. Its gotten so bad we dont speak now & I work with my office door closed (she works the receptionist desk). I literally get knots in my stomach going to work every day, some mornings I even cry. I cry when I come home, it is really effecting me because I worked so hard to build that office & its a mess. files missing, no one can find anything they are looking for and I cant do anything. Im stuck there for now & this is not helping my depression or my anxiety. We have had talk after talk & she just does what she wants. Im at a loss and I just feel so unappreciated like my opnion does not matter. I understand you will not aIways get along with everyone but its not a big office, its just me and her. I feel so empty & hurt by this after all I have given to the company
@hdetmar123
I'm so sorry that you're going through this right now. From what you've described it seems that your boss will keep the new girl because her connections to the city make her valuable enough to ignore her many faults.
I've also worked in hostile work enviroments before, and the only things that made me feel better were to come up with things I could do that would help me relax once I got home. Like, I'd get home from a day of being yelled at by bosses and customers, and then get home to make some dinner. Then I'd play video games for as long as I wanted- sometimes hack and slash fighting games like Dynasty Warriors, sometimes JRPGS with a complicated storyline that was engaging. I could do relieve the tension like that because I'd have to go to work the next day. I would have to stuff down my resentment and worry and just push through the situation till it was time for me to clock out and I didn't have to deal with it anymore.
It's also good to chat with someone. For example, I'd speak to my roommate when I finally got home, and sometimes we'd play my video games together!
@integrityblues its hard to relax when I get home. I have 5 kids, one who is autistic, so I have a lot going on. Thank you for the ideas, and that is why I came here to see how other people deal with day to day stuff that is just difficult at times. I appreciate your feedback.
@hdetmar123
I.understand completely how you feel
@integrityblues I struggle with similar feelings at work. I feel unappreciated and taken advantage of because I'm the only responsible one. Sometimes what helps is after I come home and I have a good cry or rant to my husband, I create a list of things I can control (my responsibilities, tasks, etc.) and the things I can't control (my coworkers' responsibilities) and then a list of what I can reasonably get done in a day. Going over these helps me from burning myself out trying to do everything. I just focus on getting through one day at a time until either things get better or I'm able to take a little time off to refresh. When I'm at work, I try to focus on the things I love about my job, the things that have kept me working there even through some difficult stretches.
If you can, find someone who will let you rant and talk through your feelings, especially after really hard days. Someone who understands your job and can help you clearly see what's in your control and what isn't.
It also might be useful to go over your job expectations and position responsibilities with your boss. ( This is coming from someone who has had too much anxiety to have this conversation with her boss though!)
I meant to tag @hdetmar123 sorry!