How can I stop self-sabotaging/getting in the way of my own happiness?

@decisiveLake15

Hello

I kinda think that this is one of the most complicated matters ever. I have the same problem when it's about my happiness and behaviours that have the power to destroy it. I can't get out of this circle. I feel it coming, I feel I am about to do it, I know how wrong it is and I know I can stop it....but I just don't do it, and let it come like a flood until I am basically dead. Then I tell myself I will never do it again, I commit to do my best, I think I can do it...but, well, after a while it just happens again.

I got to the point to make a sort of vow, and I really hope this will help. I had 3 good days now, I am happy for that, I just have to keep going...we will see.

My big question is: do we really have the power to stop these self damaging behaviours or not? Sometimes I think it's just a sickness, beyond my power of helping it. I hope I am wrong.

Firstly, thank you for reaching out to the community! That takes a lot of courage to do. Overcoming self sabotage does tend to take alot of work. However, it's not impossible and you've already made a really important first step. By identifying you are doing it and admitting you want to change, you can be more open to actually changing. I think a good way to progress is to identify situations in which you are currently self sabotaging. Identify thoughts and feelings associated with these things and try to think through logically. Then you can identify what the next step is. Change is always a long, difficult process, but it's worth it in the end. Good luck on your journey. I will be sending you positive vibes!

@decisiveLake15

Hey, Lake! I just wanted to drop a link to a self-help guide on 7 Cups about this question here. I also wanted to let you know how proud I am of you for look for answers. It works a bit differently for everyone, but I hope you are able to find good answers that help you get past this stuck feeling you are having. Good luck and be safe <3