I Need A Place to Vent
I am sad, lonely, having suicidal thoughts, tired, in pain, I feel like I have no friends, no one to turn to, and I don't want to tell anyone whats going on because they'll just get mad at me. My girlfriend broke up with me and is happier now than she was when we were together, I'll never have a pet that actually loves me, my future is pointless, and I don't know what to do.
I feel myself sinking quickly in to the world of darkness. I hate that I'm doing my best to have a voice to my hurt but no body is willing to listen. Instead I hear , your not weak, snap out of that, or get over it. If y'all only knew that I'm coming to you to help ease this pain I carry. I know I'm wrong in the way I feel but I can't help it. Your words are not helpful either. Instead you make me feel more hurt inside. I'm not as strong as you think I am. I have feelings of hurt and pain way more than you think I do. I battle depression every stinking day and each day I come across people who have hurt me makes it even harder .
I have been there for each one of you when you needed me repeatly . Never did I judge you or make you feel way worse so now that the supposedly strong one feels weak you react with words of not encouragement but with words that hurt me worse. Am I not allowed to hurt? Am I not allowed to feel down? Do you actually think I don't know my thoughts are wrong! I know people! I know I'm not suppose to let this bring me down! I know I'm suppose to leave it to God ! I know I'm not suppose to feel this way!!!!BUT I DO!!!!! So please before you speak , think of how I treated you when you were down, think of how you felt when I didn't react negative but instead gave you compassion . Maybe then just maybe my sinking ship will rise out of the freezing water of life and just maybe then I might see my pain in a different way than seeing it as a huge burden in y'all's life!
