I don

Ive struggled with depression almost 6 years now, im almost 20, I was in college but recently had to withdraw because my grades were struggling and i lost all motivation. I told myself that if i wont be in school then at least ill work, I found myself a job at a restaurant about an hour away from me but now I cannot even bring myself to be consistent with it. I feel like I have no drive or motivation, I really need money but it jus feels like i dont care at the same time. I dont know what to do, I dont want to work or go to school I just want to stay home and shut the world out, i dont know how to fix myself or motivate myself to do better. Im starting to get suicidal thoughts again and Im just scared at this point.