I don't know how to live anymore
Not suicidal just very lethargic.
So, I'm a disabled, single, young mother. I relied on my Dad for almost everything, until two years ago.
My Daddy was killed in a "road traffic accicent". And elderly woman was driving the wrong way up a motor way and my Dad was over taking a lorry, it was a head on collision and he died instantly.
It's impacted me a lot, I'm losing my ability to walk, I have to sleep 14 hours a day and the grief and anxiety on top of that is agony.
I cried for 10 hours last night and I don't know how to cope, how do I convince myself go into the world? I have a live in carer to look after my child, so he's safe and happy. But I'm lucky if I'm awake while he is.
Lately I've turned to drugs to help with the constant physical agony, it doesn't help my mental agony and I just need a way to cope.
Can someone tell me how to get through this please?
Teach me how to live again, please.
@AnnaKey3
I am so sorry Annakey. You were very lucky to have had your father in your life. Something my mother told me was just to get through it day by day. She was a single mother with extremely painful neurological disability (called the 'suicide disease') that managed to raise me all by herself. She had to take it day by day, even when she didn't know if she could finish it through. I think she only accomplished this by focusing solely on the positive. Having me was something she had to live for, which I believe your child is for you. What a gift it is to nurture a young and beautiful spirit in this world...what a gift it is for you to be alive! You two can grow together. Hope is the best thing you should be focusing on right now. Read an uplifting book, make a list of everything you're grateful for and really feel it. Sit with yourself...I think we're at our worst moments when we let the negativity drown us. Even a simple happy thought or something to look forward to can pull us out of it! I think it's a constant process but grief passes...love for yourself can grow...love for your life can too. Look how amazing and strong you are to have reached out on this platform. I don't know you but I send you my heart.
@foodmama1126
Thank you for your kind words, I want to recover, I know my physical condition is only going to get worse, but I think I could get my mental health to a good place if I had a way to cope, some way to get the bad out of me
@AnnaKey3
Hi Annakey, is there anyone else you could talk to about this face to face? Some friends, even if you haven't talked to them in a while? Might be scary but I've found that people are willing to listen if you are sincere. I made the decision last night to start attending anonymous support groups in my area becuase I realized the worst thing for my mental health was to keep stifling it inside of me. Maybe you could try this too.
@foodmama1126
I have no one to talk to face to face.
I live a very lonely life