I’m tired of being sad and lonely

I know I am still young and many more years hopefully to come but it is so hard going day by day knowing I got to sleep with truly no one. I have no side guys, I no longer call guys past unreasonable hours, I don’t have as many guy friends anymore but with all of those I used too. I used to have it all a month ago before I decided I depended on them all too much. Especially on the FaceTime calls I had to call one a day or I could not go to sleep. It saw all of this as unhealthy for me and so I took a break and fast forward now I feel confident in myself, I love myself even more, and I feel like I have reflected on a lot of things I should work on myself but still no guy anywhere. Its hard even being at a party today or I went back to school last week and seeing people together makes me so happy for them but sad knowing I have no one. Like at all… I wish I had that and I want that companionship but simply nothing bad for real came in a while. I almost dated a dude back in November but something happened with his ex who ultimately came back and wouldn’t leave him alone like stalking kind of crazy things. We decided to end things because she was coming for me and was going to continue. Sometimes I think of what if that didn’t happen I would actually be with him:(