I'm unfixable
Just when I really want to improve myself, my brain decides to sabotage me again. I'm really tired of it and I want to be gone.
@HITORMISSIGUESSTHEYNEVERMISSHUH
Sounds like me!
Want to see a poem i wrote about how we get in are own way?
@juliak1968
I would love to read your poem
@hibsta
Here are a few i wrote 😊
Percieving what we believe in is decieving and has no meaning as life's mistreating dishes out this beating leaving us bleeding
but we cant see it if we close our minds and we cant think about this when we're blind, so walk away and you will find, a freind here waiting for a sign!
So take your time and organise whats on your mind and you'll find you're not really behind, so relax your eyes and realize you're fine just the way you are. And you can reach for the stars, put cream on the scars and healing transpires.
The delusional parts only confuse our goals and corrupt our souls leaving us with a heart full of holes. Set goals now and your mind will see what closed eyes have failed to believe, don't let sight deceive keeping us on our knees; throwing logic into the breeze.
Winds at your back excited, Winds of hope reignited me. Step by step confide so we can share secrets of life thinking "what could be" If we let it, if you hold back you'll regret it.
There, Now I've gone and said it!
We hold ourselves down; Dirty on the ground I've found myself tourmented and bound by invisibility. I've ignorged all possibility, so I must set myself free of a self-inflicted confined mystery that causes so much mind-bending mysery.
Im having a breakdown - too much self reflection led me to detections of rejections and upon a closer inspection I found many other defects, I recolect my introspection is causing to much internal conflicting. It might be my depiction of my situation is an overloading electrocution internalized distribution prolonging my confusion. My fear-based delusion is causing me to contimplate a red profusion from a percise insicion. But it remains my decision and i still maintain my vision of a life im somehow missing, so im just sitting; on my bench is a fitting place for my thoughts to race today. What else is there to say? Should I pray, should i get up, or stay here thinking of all the terrors and trembling caused by fear, for which im well aware will soon disapear.
Im too broken, too soft-spoken, a real mess in disguise. My self hatred and contimplations to-date as I witness self-demise. Who am I, and will I find somebody I can confide? My frustration of a situation created by my denial.
@juliak1968 what lovely poetry! Beautifully composed I'm in awe
I could even imagine Eminem rapping to the second one :D
@hibsta
Im happy you liked them, i am working on my mental health ptsd and writting and rapping has helped me to figure things out. I run with a thought and when i can say what im trying to say in a rhyme, it seems to come together in ways i understand better.
I get speachless when I hear somebody is in such a depressive state feeling like quitting. I know about that to and it makes me digress. I've been in that dark hole alone time and again without a freind as i neared the end. But it passes, never lasted, left me f'n flabbergassed. But Im gratefull to those kind souls that reached out to let me know, im not alone. We suffer together, we help eachother get better. A freind always helps even when we dont know what to say. A silly poem or a saying, a bit of praying, learning to laugh at those Day's with amazement.
When you smile is produces a free drug high that makes you happy. TRY IT Stand in front of a mirror and try not to scare ya, but smile; i dare ya😊👍
Writting poems has helped me a lot as i organize my mind, i feel the need to rhyme as I pass the time reflecting feelings and deeper meanings often coming from my Day dreaming. It seems to me, the blind do see better than me, so i cannot deny these records of my trying to inspire a fire under thee😊
@juliak1968 my friend, you have a gift
And I hope you'll never stop writing.
I completely agree with you
Arts like writing and singing (among others) really have healing powers. Reading and listening to music has helped me through mine!
I hope one day we'll all be able to look back and smile at how far we've come!
@HITORMISSIGUESSTHEYNEVERMISSHUH
Here are two links to my threads, you might find my story of surviving the past couple years and all the struggles and finall some good progress 😊
Link -> Inconsequential inconsolable distraught
Link -> My Poem Diary
@HITORMISSIGUESSTHEYNEVERMISSHUH
Gotta go, it's 4am, i hope to hear from you again. You will find new strengths when their needed. Sometimes life can mistreat us. But the sun always has a way of pushing the storms off to another day. Here is something at the bottom of this page that a 7cups member sent me on one of my lowest days. It turned out to be so true, and it will for you too 😊
Good night - take good care!
When he might have won if he'd stuck it out. Don't give up, though the pace seems slow -You may succeed with another blow. Often the goal is nearer than it seems to a faint and faltering man; Often the struggler has given up when he might have captured the victor's cup, and he learned too late, when the night slipped down, how close he was to the golden crown. Success is failure turned inside out -The silver tint of the clouds of doubt, and you never can tell how close you are -it may be near when it seems afar; so stick to the fight when you're hardest hit - it's when things seem worst that you mustn't quit.