I need help and i dont know what to do
Lately it seems that life has been super unfair with different things happening in my life that i cant control. I end up getting easily upset and taking it out on my girlfriend and i love her so much id do anything to make her ahppy again but im having a hard time understanding myself and why im like this.
@Mikeprycey
Hi Mike,
I'm guessing that you feel angry and resentful, and in your position, who wouldn't...
So ask Google about anger work. Punchbags are great for getting it all out, and there are different ways too.
@Mikeprycey
im in the same boat right now. I am so unhappy with myself that I take it out on my boyfriend and it just makes him upset with me. It's a never ending cycle that I wish would stop.
@Mikeprycey
@Mikeprycey
My SO also has trouble sorting through his motivations - we all do. It's important to communicate even when you don't know what you're feeling.
I have trouble communicating to my SO as well ... he wants to fix everything, takes things personally, as if my unhappiness is rooted in him (its not). And it's so, so hard to see how my depression affects him too. But we've talked about it and he knows to ask: "Do you need anything from me?" (He used to say things like: you can't treat me like this and not talk to me, pushing me to either 1) pretend to be happy or 2) walk away).
What has helped? Communicating expectations and being explicit in what I want from him.
"Sorry I'm grumpy. I have a lot of thoughts right now and I'm still sorting through them. Can I just get a long quiet hug"?
"I'm bummed out and I don't know why. I just need to lie down for an hour. You can check on me then if you want?"
"Im not in a good mood right now, I don't know why, and I don't want to take it out on you. It's nothing you did."
It's OK to not know why you're feeling a certain way.