I’ve made some progress
Let me preface by saying I’m still fighting myself every step of the way. It’s all just a war that doesn’t end and it’s exhausting. That being said, I’ve finally gotten somewhere.
I was forced to go to the state hospital even if I couldn’t afford it. The conditions here are just awful. This place is closer to a meth lab than a hospital.
The doctors put me on a ten medication cocktail of antidepressants. I was sick the first day I took it, then I became a zombie.. This torture continued for a week with the dosages being changed so often that they finally found a combination that wasn’t making me sick.
i don’t know how to describe what’s going on in my head right now. It’s just different.
For now I’m in here. I don’t know when or if I’ll leave. But I haven’t had a breakdown for a few days. And that’s a change I welcome.
I am so, so happy to hear. Every few days of feeling slightly okay is so worth it. You are living in the present and that is good.
You are so right about being exhausted by all the fighting the illness. But you are doing a great job in fighting. You should be proud of yourself.@Server8462
@Server8462Hang in there! I want to hear more from you.
Staying at a meth lab of a hospital sounds terrible! I gotta admit, I did laugh at that description. Then I cringed. If the doctors are all wearing wife-beaters and have no teeth...run away!
No, but seriously I hope you're ok. Every day we're alive is good. *cue the song Stayin' Alive by The Bee Gees*