Mom is depressed too
So, my depression is really bad now. It's affecting my relationship with my boyfriend at this point. And now, my mom is depressed too, she was going on a vacation and got cancelled so she was crying and I feel too bad to go and comfort her cause I can barely deal with myself.
All this week I have this feeling of wearing a really thight corset, and now it's compressing even more. I'm calling a psychiatrist tomorrow, but I just don't know, I'm convinced that this is my last year on this world, I'm tired of myself, of my attitude and of my lack of motivation to change.
(Just a huge rant, not sure if my English is correct, not my native language, so, sorry if I made a mistake)
So, my depression is really bad now. It's affecting my relationship with my boyfriend at this point. And now, my mom is depressed too, she was going on a vacation and got cancelled so she was crying and I feel too bad to go and comfort her cause I can barely deal with myself.
All this week I have this feeling of wearing a really thight corset, and now it's compressing even more. I'm calling a psychiatrist tomorrow, but I just don't know, I'm convinced that this is my last year on this world, I'm tired of myself, of my attitude and of my lack of motivation to change.
Do your mother and boyfriend know about your depression?
I'm sorry that you feel so trapped, I know the feeling all too well when the end is near and you're just tired of fighting. I'm glad you're reaching out for support, and it's okay to not feel supportive of your mother when you are feeling depressed too. We cannot help others until we help ourselves.
Your English is perfect by the way.
@EastAfrique thank you. Yes, they know and they are really supportive, but I can't help to feel I'm growing distant with my boyfriend. He keeps telling me that he loves me, that I'm beautiful and talented. But it's so hard to smile and be cheerful.
@Sophig
You don't have to smile and be cheerful if you do not feel so. I am glad your boyfriend is supportive of you. Have you spoken to a counselor about how you have been feeling?