Really worried about my birthday...
I will be 20 in 6 days. a year ago on my 19th birthday i tried to commit suicide by taking a cocktail of paracetamol(a full pack) and bleach, hoping that the mix of alcohol on my so called bday night out would kill me. I collapsed before i got out into town and had to stay in hospital for 2 nights.i figured i had been depressed for a while and indeed a few days later i was diagnosed. A year on i'm fine but still so scared, i cry when i think about it and just feel so guilty towards my parents. I just want to be happy
Will you be with your parents onyour birthday? I think it would mean a lot to them if you showed them how much better you're feeling (with hugs or a phone call maybe) even if you arn't as happy as you want to be. I don't really have any good, big advice... but I figured I'd want a reply if I were you and that last sentence, damn.I've thought it so many times. And what I'm holding on to is that as long as you're alive, it'll happen. Someday you'll see someone or something beautiful, or you'll look in the mirror and see you're smiling just because life is good and worth it. So just stay alive until then. (At least that's what I tell myself). Oh and if you feel like shit on your birthday you can always come and talk to someone on this site, I think that's the whole point of it. Happy almost birthday
Thanks so much no I won't be with them but i'll give them a call hopefully it'll be okay