School has made me feel like Im not enough!
Well, things have taken a bad turn as of two weeks ago. I'm a junior in college and I study cybersecurity which I'm very passionate about. I have As in all of my classes but this one computer networking class which I am going to fail. Im someone who works very hard at school and I'm never afraid to ask for help This class, in particular, is my hardest class and I've never felt as if I don't belong in my major up until I took this class. I'm one of the only girls in my major and I'm scared that the professor is biased against women. He left a very harsh comment on an assignment of mine which had sent me into a depressive episode. Usually, comments don't send me into an episode but the comment combined with the feelings of not feeling good enough made me very depressed.
I also lost my grandpa from Italy back in February and it was very hard to cope at first and I really had no time to cope because I couldn't take time off from schoolwork, I had to get everything done because my major is that intense. I've spoken to the dean about the harsh comment but I told the dean not to mention anything to the professor because I fear of retaliation. The dean also told me 5-6 students a year complain about this professor all with the same complaint. Luckily, my dad is on my side and he will be speaking to the dean if I fail the class because he feels as if the way the professor taught the class was not effective. The class was always an online class before the pandemic. My professor wouldn't really teach us how to do things so he would have us figure it out on our own. To me, this doesn't seem right because in my other courses for my major the professors at least taught us the material.
The assignment I got the harsh comment on I got a 20 for a grade, so you would think the professor would tell me what exactly needed to be fixed but he didn't, He just berated me and talked down on me. I asked the professor what I did wrong and I was told to figure it out on my own. I'm very upset that my school has allowed my professor to teach when he, in fact, does not care about the students and gets a kick out of belittling students. I've accepted the fact that I'm going to fail the class. Our last assignment was a mock interview that went badly and I got really nervous. I know he'll write a nasty comment on my mock interview. How can I pick myself back up when I get a nasty comment from the professor? Also, when my dad speaks to the dean, whar sorts of things should I suggest to my dad for when he talks to the dean? How can I best take care of myself during this depressive episode?
