You can rant here
I know how it feels sometimes when you just want to rant, but don't know who to talk too or even if they will care. Well I care. You're not alone! Please feel free to say whats been on your mind lately, if you want someone to talk too or just want to rant away. I will listen.
I want to be me again. This person that I'm looking at isn't me and I don't know how to be me again. Everything I try makes me feel worse. I wish I had space and time to just be by myself and cry. I hate that I only see the negative. I hate that i care how people view me. I hate that hate is even in my vocabulary. I hate me.
@selfconfidentTown4326
Anxiety, depression, and unemployment
I quit my first job my freshman year in college because I thought I needed a break so I could focus on taking care of myself. At least that's what I told myself. This was probably the worst thing I could've done. After I stopped working my depression got worse. I was really lacking motivation and I didn't want to do anything. All I wanted to do was eat, watch movies, and sleep. At the time I was going to college and I was failing and dropping out of classes but somehow I managed a decent GPA to continue. I had to drop out of school my last semester for financial reasons. It's been two years and I'm still unemployed. It took me 18 months to go to my first interview. It went amazing but I quit after the first day. It was extremely stressful and I was so close to having a mental breakdown during training. After dealing with two narcissistic caregivers gaslighting me for years my memory is horrible. So its really challenging for me to go through training.
I have no confidence when applying for jobs because I have little to no skills or experience. Every time I try to apply for jobs I get discouraged because I'm under-qualified. Or when I land an interview I bail because I don't want to be judged and disappointed.I just started looking for volunteer opportunities but I have to interview for those as well. I've been dealing with this for too long and can't figure out how to break the cycle.
I'm having doubts about continuing with my college classes and I am considering dropping out from college. My parents always tell me that it's worth it as it will give me better job opportunities. I don't feel like it is worth it as it burns mostly my parents' money and I currently have a college loan debt!
@NguyenKid2 College degrees can help you get better job opportunities but its not guaranteed. Growing up I honestly thought I didn't have an option. I was still in the phase where I wanted to make my parents happy. By doing so, I put their happiness before my own. If I could do it all over again I would have waited a couple of years. There are a few things I would suggest. In the end, you have to do what makes you happy.
1. I would suggest you speak with your advisor and counselor. When I was in school I had a hard time trusting them but I wish I would have at least listened to their suggestions.
2. What if you go to school part-time and volunteer to attain actual skills you'll need once you graduate.
3. If you choose to leave, try to stay active. Find a job or volunteer.
These are things I wish I would've done while was in college.
@NguyenKid2 you will be okay. Don't overthink, and maybe consider taking a personal break from college. You could consider doing a Medical Withdrawal for mental health related reasons or otherwise simply taking a break. This way you can take time off to work and explore other avenues, but you will still have the option to continue with your education if you decide to later on. Maybe consider transferring to a different university and/or changing your major as well. Sometimes we feel as though we need to destroy some of our options in order to make a commitment... When there are so many options, sometimes we feel the need to eliminate some of them in order to fully commit to something... do you know what I mean? All this to say, don't destroy the option you have to continue your education at your university... take a break, like I said, and get your head straight and then make a decision!! If you're having so many doubts, I would highly suggest taking a step back... And remember education is a lifelong journey!! I love my college degree, although I also understand how the burden of college debt can feel. At the end of the day, it's your choice <3 I would also suggest talking openly with your parents about how you're feeling about the financial aspects, and be sure to thank them for what they have given to you!! I would also consider talking with a university counselor, professor, guidance counselor, mental health counselor, SOMETHING, for added support. Your doubts are wise and smart, so I would suggest connecting with somebody at the uni who cares about you and wants to help. Good luck!! As somebody who struggled in college, I definitely want you to have a positive experience <3 It IS a lot of money, so you want to make sure you're getting a lot of bang per buck; you want to make sure you're REALLY appreciating, loving, and gaining from your experience!! You are NOT supposed to suffer and struggle through college....... I highly highly recommend a break! :) You will figure this out!! You got this!
I get so annoyed with myself when I realize the only goals I've achieved lately involve playing Final Fantasy 9. So it's great that I've trained my Chocobo and got him all the special abilities and got him to Chocobo Paradise. It's awesome that I found all the treasures and even located Mog central so I can figure out why my character's been running around delievering mail. It's cool that I've found some of the most powerful weapons in the game. The overachieving completionist in me is pleased with the developments, but that in the long run it isn't as important as anything else I should be able to do but can't.
Im a 19 year old guy. I work full time at Target, my job sucks, and my home life sucks. My parents have been fighting most of my childhood over money and my dad is a recovering alcoholic. I was bullied from 8th grade basically up until I graduated which caused me great anxiety that wont go away. All of this has made me into who I am today. I met a girl I really loved but she left me because I thought what my dad was doing was okay. Ive never abused a girl in any kind of way but I would get into verbal arguments a lot. Part of this is because of my dad and because Im very paranoid from bullying. She had cheated on me multiple times. She went off with some guy and Im still alone. Ive always been told Im a good looking guy but Ive never believed it because I dont believe it to be true. I lost my license to a DUI last August and I became very withdrawn after that. Im at the point where I have like 4 friends, I have no desire to speak to hangout with anyone, and Im always on my phone in my free time but dont really respond to people. Im getting my license back soon, Im saving up all my money for a nice down payment on a nice car, but despite this I know Ill end up choosing to drive alone than choose to see people. I hate being withdrawn but Im able for the world to see me for who I am. I dont want to be loved by a bunch of people for someone I am not. I was doused in gas by everyone around me and I lit the match.
my sister is always yelling at my parents. It drives me crazy. She gets mad about the smallest and stupidest things. Im already really stressed about school and my social life, I dont need her adding on to that. I feel like I have no friends. I mean I have friends but I dont really. Not close ones at least. I have a couple but we barely ever hang out. Most of my friends only pay attention to me during school. Not even during lunch.
UGGGHHHHHHH!!!!! ARRRHHHHHHG!!! MMMRRAAARRRGGGHHHH!!!!!
Just needed to yell, lol!! Maybe I need to scream into a pillow or go to the top of a mountain to scream my heart and lungs out lol!! Don't know why...
It's just... PEOPLE sometimes, you know? This political season is GRATING on me! As somebody who falls dead center in political views, neither left nor right, neither up or down, very moderate, very independent, I'm getting flack from both sides and it's stressing me out.
I'm from a Christian background and I'm feeling a little disowned and ex-communicated by people from my past, whether they are doing it intentionally or not I don't know... I'm just feeling disappointed and lonely; I think I am a valid person who studied intensively in college, admitedly I fell into difficult times and didn't always make the right choices, but mental health was a major reason for my downfall and problems... During those hard times, I felt totally abandoned and vilified by those people from my past. I want to maintain friendships and stay in touch, and I feel very isolated and abandoned. I understand we're all getting older and people move on and cultivate new friendships, however this feels abnormal, contrived, purposeful, intentional, forced, deliberate, hurtful, intentionally hurtful, etc. Not sure if it's all in my head or if they're really doing this to me on purpose.
Then I have the more liberal community I joined in college, where I often feel pigeon-holed and scapegoated ("She's from a religious background and probably is stupid or hateful in one way or another, just needs some exposing and education.....")...
Can't people just be normal and accept people for who they are? I feel very lonely. I need a job, a community, friends, something of my own... I have my boyfriend, but sometimes I'm still feeling lonely in the relationship. I don't know if it's all in my head, or maybe I have trouble connecting with him or maybe it's just natural??
I'm starting to question and doubt myself, am I a bad person? It feels like people took advantage of my vulnerability when I was having serious mental health problems and they've been taking the chance to kick me when I'm down, trying to bring out the worst in me and then judging and criticizing the results; for example doing subtle insults and then calling me a mean person for getting upset with them about it.
I'm disappointed... I started out very well in life, good education, good environment, a very very strong work ethic, smart, capable, driven, and it feels like I just fell flat on my face in college. Sometimes felt bullied into falling flat on my face. Sometimes wondering if I deserved it in any way.
I feel hurt by my family and old friends especially.
My principles feel hurt sometimes, because I believe in lifting people up, not taking advantage of a person's downfall to keep them down. We're all in this together and we want each and every one of us to be functional, healthy, and contributing. Such a mentality benefits everybody; being around people who you are putting down and hurting doesn't make any sense because it lessons your own experience.
I often feel misunderstood.
This is how I've been feeling lately. I've also had guilt about seeking help and dealing with all the ramifications of this drama. I'm not able to work right now, because I feel so psychologically hurt, confused, overwhelmed, burnt out, so I'm dependent on my boyfriend. I overuse 7 Cups, I think, calling Listeners way too often. I will have to transition to spending more time on the message boards. I feel bad about being so needy.
Psychologically, I've just been through so much. People don't seem to understand psychological abuse, mental health problems, emotional abuse, women's struggles, they don't seem to understand it as much as they should. It's a double whammy because the issues I'm going through are significant and also difficult to get help for.
I also feel a sense of deep disengagement, directionless. I no longer know what I want in life, I don't know what career I want or even if I want to have a career, and I never expected I'd be in this place. My life has not gone according to plan, and I question the life I have now. I thought I would be somebody who would be great, do great, maybe get a PhD or something or have some kind of career. At the same time, I never really knew what my future held and my life seemed like a blank, empty canvas after college in many ways. But I did really expect to go to grad school.
I need to be in therapy, but I'm having trouble getting it arranged. I have no money. Even something as simple as getting transportation to therapy seems like a challenge for me. Lots of logistical transitions in my life right now, for example will need new health insurance soon.
I'm looking forward to therapy this Thursday for free at a charitable location near me.
I am naturally resilient, as you can see I bounced back up a bit just now after writing it out. However, I think my resiliency bothers people in my life... I think there are some people in my life who are insanely jealous of me or else they just want to destroy my spirit for whatever reason. Because sometimes it feels like this resiliency and buoyancy is something other human beings are trying to destroy in me.
I was recently diagnosed as schizophrenic, so maybe I'm just being paranoid. I don't know.
If you read all of this, I wish you something amazing in your near future and best wishes to you, thank you.
I'm seeking encouraging, reassuring comments, personal stories from you, how did you make it through difficult times? anyone else going through anything similar? coping tips for making it through this difficult political season.
So like my problem feels miniscule camosred to slot of people on here but I was really looking for advice. So I'm 16, and I've been talking to this girl for a little over a month abd I finally asked her out last Friday, the thing is she said she'd love to but her parents don't want her to date until she's 16, she 15 right now. I really like her but am not going to disregard her parents because I respect them. So what do you guys think I should do? Maybe get to know her parents better and ask them to make an exception?
@Yurai I'd say don't worry about dating right now. Get to know her better as a person, and let her get to know you. If you really like being around each other waiting awhile for her to turn 16 probably won't be a real problem.
Meeting her parents might be a good step, but you're not going to impress anyone by trying to get around her parents rules.
I am so miserable and I keep beating myself up because of my acne. I am so self conscious and I have never opened up to ANYONE about my acne. I am ugly without makeup, so I wear concealer all the time. I feel like a disappointment to past me. I'm so sorry 5 year old me. I let you down by letting my insecurities get the best of me. I am nostalgic because I used to have clear skin. I am obsessed with my skin now and I want perfection. I feel awful and I cry every time I look into the mirror. Sometimes I just can't take it anymore. I press my face into my pillow and drown out the world, and stare at my ceiling fan. I am depressed, miserable, and incredibly frustrated that I just hate myself. You say it will get better, but what if I am stuck looking like this forever? What if I have scars as an adult...
@ it will be okay. Acne and scars don't say anything about who you are.
Had a really bad anger outburst this morning. Had to deal with real bad stomach cramps, in addition to the emotions and stress of the past week. The fact that no matter what I did I'd have to endure this pain, was too much in the moment. My therapists tell me to try and delay these outburst, but anytime I do the stress just builds up and up, and an outburst is inevitable. I've been actively dealing with this for a year and a half now, and it just feels like I always end up in the same place. Its hard to see the point of it all.
Anyway, rant over. I'll get my pretend stability back soon enough. Wonder what the next thing will be my brain over reacts to 🤗
@Madaraismyspiritanimal