A vicious cycle (?)

Now I don't know if my feelings are considered "normal", but I don't seem to be able to handle them. For the past almost year now I've been struggling with a multitude of combined problems, depression and anxiety being two of those. At first I thought it was just because I was hopelessly (to the fullest extent of the word) in love. But I think I've figured out what my actual problem is. Not that I'm anywhere near feeling better, because like the title says, I'm trapped in a vicious cycle. So here's my theory: For some reason, unknown to me, I'm, in a sense, addicted to a physical connection. And I haven't had anything remotely like that in a long time, so it's almost like I'm going through withdrawl, or something like that (...?). Anyways I have this need or emotion or whatever building up inside me and the only way for me to release that would be for me to be in a relationship where I'd have a physical connection with someone (and I'm not just talking about hugs, but holding hands, cuddling and that kind of stuff). The only problem is I can't trust myself to even begin such a relationship out of fear of it ending or not succeeding in the first place, which in turn, would send me over the edge once more. I don't know, what I'm expecting of you guys, but maybe some of you have some thoughts on this issue? Maybe some of you suffer or have suffered from a similar situation? I dunno... I just would like to find a way for all this to stop...