I think I may need help, but I am not sure.(possible trigger warning)

Hello,

I feel as though I may have a problem, but I can't be sure if it is just me overreacting or if it is actually something which I should be worried about. I've seen a therapist before, however I no longer have a way to reach that lifeline, and I've started to question if my information is being relayed to others(however, this may just be me). I was initially dragged to a therapist around a year ago when I was found by my guardian with visible self inflected wounds, which I denied but to no avail, and have been placed on a course of antideppressents. I haven't told anyone that said wounds were actually a symptom of a four year long track of self injury(not sure if this is bad or not)which has resulted in rather ugly scars on my thighs, shoulders, and arms. After being caught, I refrained from the act out of fear of getting in trouble again(and still am till this day, which is odd)however I have started up again in the last month or so. I have also began to pick at my skin when faced with situations of stress and discomfort however minor, which has once again resulted in noticable scars on my hands and thighs. The past few days have been especially uncomfortable for me, as I now have ugly, red lines up my thighs and shoulder and I've been crying over the most minor things. I am going to be honest here because I want to know if anyone knows what is going on because I am in all honesty a bit scared, earlier I contemplated taking my own life which seemed empty and my fear of death prevented me from doing such and I have been plauged by constant headaches and pressure. I don't know what to do anymore, as I can't shake feelings of apathy and sadness, and I just can't deal with it anymore. Should I be worried? Or am I simply babbling?