Not suicidal but having thoughts about it?
Okay so I have anxiety that turns into agoraphobia sometimes which causes me to become depressed. I am not suicidal, I don't plan it or anything. But for some reason my mind obsesses over "what if I become suicidal?" and as soon as that thought comes to mind I have such intense anxiety. I do not isolate myself at all, if anything I make sure I am ALWAYS with someone and I am very open about what I'm feeling and thinking. I don't know if I should be concerned? Could this be anxiety more than anything?
@wendyeliza22 Hey, I know the feeling, ive been there and I still am there actually. I dont think suicidal thoughts can be blames on anxiety or depression I think suicidal thoughts are an outcome but if you are struggling maybe try finding coping mechanisms for when you do have these thoughts. I know it sounds so easy and i know its not, But when someone gets a thought the more they think on it they bigger it gets the longer you find yourself thinking about it and then it gets you so down, try finding something that might help, you may have to try a few things before you find one that actually helps but its worth a try. You could, listen to music, draw, play games, come on here sometimes talking about something else on here can help or if your a listener try help others with problems not involving what your going through or it might be a trigger chat. yeah these will suppress the suicidal thoughts, it wont get rid of them but it will start to pushthem away a bit at a time and yo9u might find that it cfould be 5 minutes before u think about it again,but if you keep at it the next time might not be till 6 minutes later or 7 and every little step might not6 be a huge impact but every little step counts
@HeartbreakloverK thank you for this, makes me feel that I'm out of it or alone or something. I don't always have thoughts like that, it's almost like my mind will just remind me like "hey remember that one time you felt suicidal?" And that's what starts it. I'm usually able to just allow the thoughts to pass without reacting to them but i do have moments where I just question myself and just everything. A lot of it feels like it's obsessive thoughts like it I don't think about them it will happen, if I don't worry that means i don't care, or if I don't worry about the future it means I won't have a future. When I have suicidal thoughts they don't usually happen when I'm sad and they don't make me sad either, instead they make me anxious because I'm so scared of death
@wendyeliza22 Part of feeling depressed or having a very low self steam is having this suicidal thoughts, they might not be a real threat, but I think is imoportant for you to treat them with a therapist and to take care of yourself. If you feel like you need to talk to someone you can pm me anytime .
I agree. One of the symptoms of depression is thoughts about death, including suicide, which do not automatically mean that you are suicidal. I agree that it is good to talk about it with a therapist, even if you are not suicidal. It's an idea that's bothering you and it's okay to talk about it. I also noticed that you said it's almost like an obsession. Have you mentioned that to a therapist or psychiatrist? And I saw that you try to just let your thoughts go without hanging on to them, and that is good. But I wonder how you would feel if you just made space for these thoughts and whatever feelings they bring up. How would that be? And if you feel very anxious, then you can maybe have a look at the self-help guide about anxiety? You can find the self-help guides when you click on Path (blue bar above) and then Self-help guides. Good luck!
@Chiaroscuro1 thank you! I do speak to a therapist on here but I will be meeting with a psychiatrist tomorrow and most likely meeting with a therapist face to face as well. My therapist on here told me that these thoughts seem to be mainly anxiety and the obsessive thoughts that can come with anxiety. I have no longer had thoughts about suicide since I posted on this forum so that's good but I know there is a chance that these thoughts may still come back so I'll definitely continue to talk about it when needed
@wendyeliza22
@wendyeliza22
One major part of depression is having suicidal thoughts which you think might take over. However if you keep battling them and block out bad thoughts, you could possibly prevent it. For now, they might not be a real threat as you do not feel suicdal however but you should seek professional help for sure.