Hi from someone feeling blue

Decided to try this app and I am scared of starting a conversation so I just say hi here and tell briefly what bugs me and keeps me from healing from my depression:

-struggled with depression since 2014, that i know of(on meds, no money for therapy)

-feel like my meds dont work like they did

- i am a bad sleeper and my energy levels are so low

- dance helped my mood but now i am getting injured and too tired to train too

- i hate the way i look which brings me down

- I turned 30 last year, i feel suddenly old and that i missed about a decade

- my longtime spouse decided not to try on our relationship last summer, i had to move out and take care of our dogs myself

- i am trying to keep busy with my career but studies and work things keep stressing me as i have no stability

-my grandpa died and he was like a father to me

-my real dad is an alcoholic and now my grandma has decided that we need to form a relationship which pains me as he has never been there for me and i do not think him as my father figure

- i feel lonely

- i get the blues often