New

Hello everyone. I am new here and just trying to get a feel for all this. I find it really difficult to put into words what is happening in my world, I am always fearful of sounding like I am whining. I have difficulty with people who ALWAYS complain about things and I feel hypocritical doing the same thing. So I simply dont talk about things. Vicious cycle I have created for myself.

I feel as though my entire world has fallen apart and I am not sure how to put it back together. I live with chronic pain (5 years and counting) and despite it being fairly controlled it takes a massive toll. I cant do all the things I used to do and still want to so I feel as if I am letting everyone down.

I have 3 children, all grown, yet I only have a relationship with 1, because I refuse to tolerate drug abuse. I realize its the right choice however they are my kids. I miss who they used to be and I worry about them but I am helpless to help them. My heart is broken.

I am separated from my husband, I have no desire to repair the relationship, its broken beyond repair and I am okay with that however it is another failure in my world.

There is a lot more but for now thats all I care to share if thats okay. I am tired, I feel broken but I want to feel better. I know I need some kind of help so I am starting here.

Thanks for listening.