Gaining wait and freaking out.
So I use to be Anorexic. I don't actually have an eating disorder right now but I have started gaining wait and it is freaking me out. At first I didn't think it was a big deal to try and diet but now I am skipping meals again. I realized today that I was drinking water in place of lunch. I think I might be fall back into old patterns.
I understand. Our bodies will change over time and we can never know when. Remember: once you have an eating disorder and begin recovery, you are "in recovery". You still have the eating disorder, unfortunately and this means lapses and relapses are both possible. It is okay to gain weight, it can even be a sign of being healthy and being in a stage of recovery. Treat your body with compassion and give it whatever it needs! Work with your dietician and therapist to discuss this more.
I can completely relate to what you’re going through. I think once you have an eating disorder, it never fully goes away, meaning you are in recovery. Gaining weight can be scary when you have an ED, but remind yourself you are more than the number on the scale. Talk to yourself as you would a friend going through this. You’re already doing great, recognizing that you are slipping back into old habits. When you catch yourself skipping a meal or obsessing over what you eat, remind yourself that bodies need food to function and it is okay to give yourself the nutrients you deserve. Best of luck:)
