@diligentChestnut2432 Sounds like you've convinced yourself of that. Why not try and tell yourself a different story, like "I'm finding new creative outlets to bring me joy" and it's much more bound to happen, you know? Decide to allow other things to lift you up...preoccupy yourself way from food. What interests do you have?
Yeah, sometimes I feel like food is the only thing that brings me joy. However, when i think harder upon it, I can come up with other things that make me happy too: snuggling with my dog, listening to the birds in the morning. But these things don't feel as RELIABLE as food. With food, I know I will immediately be rewarded, even though the remorse will set in later. I want to focus more on the non-food pleasures in life. But that feels disappointing and hard to do. It feels like something wonderful is to be taken away from me if I can't splurge how I want.
@MsBrownieBee Yes! This really resonated with me. Food is my reliable best friend after all these years. Waaaah!
@MerHere
My relationship with food is my best friend, when my best friend is, sure, always there. But I feel guilty after hanging out with her to the exclusion of my other activities. She's pretty two-faced and makes me mad when she goes behind my back and says what a bad person I am. She only wants to eat, and if I won't join her in "going unconscious," she gets childish and pokes at me -- very annoying. I am fatigued with her incessant prodding, "Is it time to eat yet? When do we eat? What kind of goodies are we gonna get tonight? I promise you'll feel better! No Really, this time will be different -- binge out with me and we'll both just float off to oblivion." She's a noisy pest.