Newbie here
Hello all, I think i have an eating disorder. I guess the first step for me was to recognize that i was doing to my body wast normal. Since I remember i have always feel insecure about my body. Im not a big girl 5’4 and i have never consider myself over weight. Last year i want to loose a couple of pounds so I started doing keto diet. I lost lost of weight but like i said i was overweight to begin with just 150 pounds. I got to 130 and people started noticing and tell me that i look good and how skinny i look. Thats when the problem started. I was afraid that when i ate i was going to gain gain so i started throwing up after each meal. To begin with i was only having dinner at night so i was throwing up my only meal. Fast forward to this year, im still 130 but feel so week. Now i dont eat as much because i dont want to throw up. I know i have a problem i jusy wish it wasnt like that.
@Lonelystar2020 Hello! I agree the first step is always to recognise that the relationship with food and dieting is no longer healthy and I am really proud of you for recognising it and even taking the next step and reaching for support. Eating Disorders are tricky, they do tend to creep up on people seemingly out of nowhere. You started with a healthy diet with good intentions, but it roughed up your relationship around food and it can be very scary. Avoiding eating so you don't have to engage in scary behaviour can be exhausting, plus the body needs food for fuel so it can leave you very weak as you expressed. The fear of gaining weight back is very scary and I definitely understand how it can feel that your good work can be reversed if you would eat again, especially being encouraged for what you've "achieved" right now. Have you ever talked to anyone about what is going on? What have you tried so far to cope with it?