Am I relapsing?
I’ve been dealing with eating disorders since I was 10, first it was throwing up and I changed it for starving, last year I had a major relapse and I got to the point where my hair was falling, I had cold and I had acne. I’ve been trying to recover but since last month everything I eat disgusts me, there are just little things that I really want to eat and the list keeps getting smaller, I would prefer not eat at all, food makes me feel dirty and I don’t know how to feel clean after I ate something that’s not healthy like fruits or vegetables, even if food has a little fat makes me feel so sick.
i don’t know what am I supposed to do about this, before it was only because I felt ugly and fat but I think it’s getting worse and now I’m not really hungry and I don’t want to get dirty eating.
I’m sorry to hear your condition T-T I totally can’t relate to what you’ve been through, but the way you say it sounds very terrible and I don’t know how the f you can survive feeling that miserable. Since 10 T-T it breaks my heart somehow. Poor you.. you deserve to enjoy life and enjoy food. I don’t know who made you this way if I know that person I would slap them so bad >:(
I’m no professional so the best thing to do is looking for professional. The second best thing is to reach out for those you love.. I hope they would guide you about food slowly, and telling you how beautiful you are, appreciate you not only your physical but your inner beauty as well..
You’ve gone through a lot sweetheart T-T I hope you don’t have to feel that misery anymore. Please reach out for help. We all here believe in you. You can change this skewed perspective about food. You can do this! *hugs
Thats terrible I'm so sorry to hear that. I don't want to give out a diagnosis because I'm not a professional, but maybe look into orthorexia? It sounds like you may be struggling with something similar
