I'm not too sure what is wrong with me
For several years now, ive had cycles of binging, not eating at all, restricting what i eat, and overexercising. Ive had issues dealing with other people's opinions and i can't help but point out everything wrong with me when i look in the mirror. Everytime i convince myself that im getting better, that im getting more positive and such, i just completely crash again, most of the time ill start restricting what i eat again. I don't know if i am just weird or if i have something actually wrong with me. I desperately want to fix this cycle. Im sick of feeling awful all of the time.
@Jules19061 Hi Jules - can you tell what the trigger is? You say that you'll be doing well and then things will start again. Is there something that sets you off where your self-criticism kicks in?
@WasaBePanda8675 usually when jokes are made about my weight by friends, but my biggest trigger is my step mother. Its almost like she's obsessed with the fact that im going to get fat. When i do eat, she always gives me a disgusted look, or she'll say, should you really be having that or that much? After that, the self criticism kicks in, and i start restricting but then i usually start to feel guilty (about not telling my best friend what is going on) and once he does find out, the guilt becomes too much and i start binging like crazy to try to make up for the restricting i was doing.