Letter to My Unhealthy Behavior (writing exercise, share yours below!)

i really love this idea!!

Dear ED,

you really have messed me up in the head. truly, you've ruined so much for me. the lies you tell me are getting so tiring. you've taken so much from me. i no longer am able to eat with my friends. i barely fit in any of my favorite clothes. every reflection i look into i see ugly. everything is so ugly now. you've made me dull. my legs shake when i bend down. my hands never stop shaking. my hair is falling out every where. more random bruises are starting to appear. you did this to me. i would've turned out alright if you didn't screw me over like this. i ask myself all the time, "why me?" and i still can't seem to figure out. all i do is think of you, but i hate you.

my life would be so different without you. i'd love life. i'd love food. i'd love myself. my friends wouldn't be so worried. i wouldn't have to worry about facing my parents. i would have my whole self back again. i'm such a shell right now. don't you see? you did this to me. it's not my fault, but it feels like it is. i wish i could get better, but you are relentless. fuck you.

one day i'll make it. i'll get better. this experience will change me. it'll prove to myself that i am stronger than i thought. but right now this experience is killing me. i hope you let up. i really hope that you loosen your grip on me. i would do anything to live life like i did before you. i hope you leave soon, but until then, fuck you.

sincerely,

someone so tired of your shit

This is me writing to myself.. I don't know how it works.. So lets begin see i know right now you're not doing good from morning anxiety to randomly crying in bathroom.. Waiting for clock to tick 7 pm so you could just go out and be alone.. Cry.. No will to eat... With 0 progress in your work life... Those haunting memories attacking randomly whenever they want... I know this letter has no flow.. But this is me writing whatever is happening with no filter.... This is your bad phase it will pass... It will scar you for life but it will pass m....it always has. You'll get over it....

Hey! I'm not really sure why all my words are showing up as random figures... Sorry!