Not sure if this is a disorder/help pls

So I’m not really sure if I have an ‘eating disorder’ as such, I struggled a lot with my eating about 8 years ago and I lost a lot of weight due to. I felt a lot of satisfaction from this after struggling with my weight and the thought of eating really made me feel sick and I became too scared to eat - this did not help my Emetophobia either😩 but I slowly began to eat even just singular meals a day which over time increased to ‘normal’ (?) eating. However now I feel like I have such a problem with over eating and indulging , I don’t know if my body feels like I need to eat all of these foods incase I suddenly decide not to again, I sometimes am not even hungry but I push myself beyond this to eat foods that I am not even interested in eating! Sorry for the long post, I just feel so silly and crazy for this but don’t really know what I should be doing! Thank you.