Table Manners and ED?

I've been trying to find something about this for hours but am coming up surprisingly empty. I've been trying to work towards recovery for a few weeks but I've found a bit of a setback in something I think is completely ridiculous: table manners. My boyfriend is a huge stickler for table manners and has even told me that the way he was raised, if you didn't have impeccable table manners, you'd get slapped. We went out to lunch with a friend of his and their family last week which was already an anxiety-inducing idea for me-- eating out with strangers? Might as well just lock me in a cage and put me in a shark tank because it feels like the exact same thing. I was so focused on just eating and trying to appear normal (meaning eating like a normal human being and eating a normal amount and trying not to look terrified) that table manners apparently fell to the wayside. I try to be as polite and agreeable when eating out as I can but I guess it's not enough. My boyfriend's friend's dad, who was very kind and welcoming right off the bat, had placed a stack of napkins in the center of the table. I was under the impression that it was a "take as you need" scenario, especially since we were in a very casual, diner setting. I ordered a sandwich and didn't necessarily want to unwrap my unused silverware just for the napkin so I reached over to grab one of the loose napkins at the center of the table only for my boyfriend to glare at me and tell me "Hey, ASK." I think what made it worse was that I didn't understand what was going on or what he was looking at me so harshly for, I didn't comprehend that he was telling me to ask him to get me a napkin rather than reach over to get one myself. He said later that it was because I reached over his food right as he was about to take a bite and that it was rude and an invasion of his personal space or whatever but I felt like he made a big deal out of it at the table in front of everyone and it really hindered my comfort and deterred me from wanting to eat any more or even spend anymore time around these people than I needed to (which didn't help the fact we ended up spending the entire afternoon with them). My boyfriend did something similar again today. I'm just getting over the flu and even though my congestion has cleared up, I haven't been able to breathe all week, nor have I had any appetite. I was getting to the point today where my hunger was starting to catch up with me but in a way that still made me feel nauseous and like nothing on hand to eat was even appetizing. I ended up making myself some toast to snack on and as I'm sitting here eating, my boyfriend turns around to just look at me and I know immediately that he's silently telling me to shut up, basically, because apparently I have a tendency to chew with my mouth open or chew loudly or something. I know this obviously can be a nuisance and I'm angry with myself for it because I don't even realize I'm doing it when I am but sometimes when he gets on my case about bad table manners like this, it makes me paranoid about what else I might be doing when I eat and just overall ends up with me feeling like I don't want to eat at all. I don't feel comfortable eating because I feel like I'm a nuisance, like I'm disgusting, or like I'm even a failure because god forbid I'm less than perfect and someone has to point that out to me. Does anyone else have issues like this? Or does this just sound like my boyfriend being a petty pain in the ass?